Any success stories here with coping with strong ED sexual anxiety

[vincentmh]

30 years old.

All my blood test came back fine without any problem. Very fit and healthy. High testosterone. No depression or health problem.
(I will be seeing an urologist this year to investigate my strong ED more.. see if i have venous, arteries problem) But until then i see no solution for me.

I tried therapy but didnt help and very expensive after multiple appointments.. everything my therapist told me could be found free on youtube instead of paying 100$+ for 45 minutes.

I feel completely impotent with my new girlfriend and its now a strong vicious circle. I want to avoid every sexual situation..

So assuming my problem is more mentally than physically, anyone here manage to find a solution.? thnak you so much !

[Time2Change]

30 years old.

All my blood test came back fine without any problem. Very fit and healthy. High testosterone. No depression or health problem.
(I will be seeing an urologist this year to investigate my strong ED more.. see if i have venous, arteries problem) But until then i see no solution for me.

I tried therapy but didnt help and very expensive after multiple appointments.. everything my therapist told me could be found free on youtube instead of paying 100$+ for 45 minutes.

I feel completely impotent with my new girlfriend and its now a strong vicious circle. I want to avoid every sexual situation..

So assuming my problem is more mentally than physically, anyone here manage to find a solution.? thnak you so much !

Could you give us some more information about yourself and your ED?

How long you've had ED. When ED started. Was there a period of time when you didn't have ED?

[Martin6469]

Your term "Anxiety" reminds me of the curious "Hard/Flaccid" problem, which has its own topic here on Frank Talk. Take a look there, and particularly at "Hard Flaccid - success story..." from Fed1981 9-3-20, and his original ED description: "27-year-old pump injury..." in General Discussion 8-1-20.

[SteveD]

There may be a corollary for the guys who have a RP for PCa and experience a sudden, and often total, inability to get an erection. The psych affect is profound. Search out some of the posts on RP and see if there's something that provides you a measure of support.

[Lost Sheep]

There may be a corollary for the guys who have a RP for PCa and experience a sudden, and often total, inability to get an erection. The psych affect is profound. Search out some of the posts on RP and see if there's something that provides you a measure of support.

I may be a case in point. My decades long struggle with ED ended in 2017 with an AMS LGX. Sex since then has been GREAT!

Enter prostate cancer and prostatectomy in October 2023. Because of the location of the reservoir and adherence to the pelvic facsia, the reservoir had to be removed, leaving me 100% impotent as well as incontinent. Double whammy. There may be a third component, nerve damage making sensations (ans therefore orgasm) impaired. Time will tell about that. So, a triple whammy maybe.

My ED/Impotence before 2017 did not bother me much because I was for a large time of those decades, I was unaware of what was deficient in my sexual abilities and for most of the latter years I found ways of satisfying my lovers which allowed me to keep my sexuality intact and enjoyable. Cunnilingus and fellatio were wonderful when my erections were inadequate.

Now, with the sudden and total loss of erections (after 5 years of reliable implant-provided erections) has left me frustrated (not to mention my girlfriend). On top of that, fellatio is out of the question because of the incontinence.

While I am working on exercises and strengthening to control the incontinence (which looks like it will take months), the lack of intimacy has left me frustrated and with an unaccustomed, low-grade persistent irritation/anger in my emotional makeup.

Note: Incontinence is a common side-effect of radical prostatectomy but varies widely between patients. Depends on skill of the surgeon, of course, but more on the condition of the patient going into the surgery, the amount of tissues that had to be removed and from where and amount of nerve damage. Some men experience permanent impairment, some men have no problems at all once the catheter is removed. And everywhere in between.

Success story? I was pretty successful coping with ED and its anxieties before my implant. But the suddenness (and the surprise, since I was not expecting the reservoir to have to be removed though I knew it was a possibility) has hit me harder than I (even now typing this assessment) realize.

So, yes there is bound to be need for coping with loss of sexual function after any surgery. The life-threatening factor of prostate cancer does not help, either.

Remember also that not every prostatectomy results in ED.

[bldoink]

LS, I'm sorry you're having to go through this. I pray you have rapid success in your recovery. If you ever want to talk hit me up with a PM.

[Flavio]

[...] I feel completely impotent with my new girlfriend and its now a strong vicious circle. I want to avoid every sexual situation..

[...]

I know this feeling only too well. A self-fulfilling prophecy.

Psychogenic ED is easily treatable but it may require some time and patience.

Here's what I did back in the day: whenever I had a negative sexual experience (in my case, it was inability to penetrate, I suffered from coital anxiety), I would have a break for a week, a month whatever it took. I stopped all sexual activity for a while. This allowed me to relax, clear my mind and regain my confidence.

Today I just don't care. I can have a bad experience and then be ready for action five minutes later.

[Flavio]

I don't want to brag but I am definitely a success story and if I can do it, anyone can.

My sex life was pathetic in my 20s because I knew nothing about it. I suffered from coital anxiety. I never even thought of it as a medical condition, that's how stupid and ignorant I was.

It all changed when I turned 30. I believe I started with a penis ring, then Viagra and then combination therapy.

My online friends sometimes make fun of me for trying so many different drugs but it has paid off. My current regimen works beautifully: undenafil, oral phentolamine, Seredyn and more recently Eroxon. The latter is getting terrible reviews on FT but, believe me, it's not a scam.

Everyone is different, so this may not work for you. And needless to say, seeing a doctor is essential.