My Story - Intro to my journey

[josemaria]

Hi,
I just joined this group because I am looking for information and support from other people who have had experience with implants. I was born with what they call "hypospadia" which is a penile condition in which the urethral orifice is not at the tip of the penis but below at the front. This condition was surgically corrected to a certain degree when I was a little kid. Back in 1990, when I was 29 yrs old I was diagnosed with testicular cancer and underwent a radical removal of my left testicle and a subsequent retro-peritoneal lymph node dissection to verify if the cancer has spread. In 2016 I was diagnosed with a rare lung cancer and also had my upper left lung removed. In 2020 I had a prostate cancer which ended in the removal of my prostate and my complete loss of erections. This happened during the early Covid-19 pandemic days and I guess due to the lack of proper follow-up medical visits and other situations, my urologist did not start it me on sildenafil or tadalafil until 6 months have elapsed from my prostate surgery. Also, I was not provided or told I needed to use a vacuum pump one month after surgery so I started these about 6 months or more after. Since none of these remedies were producing me an erection, I decided to try Trimix injections which also provided me a soft erection which did not last more than 5 or 10 minutes. I also noticed the tip of my penis was bent like the old Concorde plane. Took some photos and showed them to another urologist and he recommended to fix that with another specialist which has also suggested me to have the penis implant.
To all this, my wife of 20 yrs has been telling me I don't love her any more because I don't desire her and a bunch of other things. She does not want me to have the implant because she says I will not use it on her. She is the type of woman who says "why are you caressing me and making me horny if you cannot penetrate me" and on other days before the prostate surgery when viagra used to work she used to say "you want to make love to me because you have an erection, not because you desire me". My newest urologist has requested to take her with me on my next appointment so he can have a talk with her.
Right now, I am waiting to have a cystoscopy done in February in order to have the implant surgery scheduled. I am 60 yrs old and should be able to handle another surgery to have a better sexual life. I hope my wife changes her point of view about the implants soon. Anybody have had this sort of issues with your partner? For us it has been more than 1.5 yrs without being able to have sex and she does not want me to have oral sex on her because she likes to finish with penetration.
I will be posting updates soon...
Thanks for reading.

[68CatFan]

Hmm. Women often play little head games, but they should also know there comes a time when they need to stop. I don't know your wife, but the things she says sounds familiar to stories I've heard before... a few of them on here. A combination of selfishness and insecurity is probably causing her to say the things she does. Either way it's time to stop.
Sounds like you're headed in the right direction. Go get an implant. Your self-esteem and confidence will improve significantly and hopefully your wife will start enjoying intimacy with you without the sarcastic remarks.
Where, by chance, are you located? A lot of members here like to meet others and share their experiences.

[josemaria]

Thanks 68CatFan.
I live in Puerto Rico. I am a USAF veteran and most of my surgeries have been performed at our San Juan VA Hospital. We have some good urologist and surgeons there. As a matter of fact, my local urologist declined to do my prostate surgery because of my previous surgeries in my same body region. The surgeon who performed my prostate removal is the one who teaches other surgeons during their internships. He once told me, get did surgery (prostatectomy) done because dead people don't fuck! That was quite an eye opener for me.
But, the urologist who will perform my implant surgery is another one from the same VA Hospital who specializes in implants and penile corrections for Peyronie's disease. He has already check me and told me I have some scar tissue build up which is currently causing the bent tip. I consider this my last opportunity before "I hang by gloves for good"...
I know it will be painful, but by what I read here, it will be worth it!