Benjohn wrote:Thanks for the update. Glad it's going well. Still terrified of the thought of having this done at some point! Keep the updates coming
I know the feeling but don’t be terrified (easier said than done)... I have had my fair share of surgeries and medical procedures, however I will never get used to things like the smell of a hospital, fear of needles, anxiety in anticipation, fear of medical mistakes...etc but just like my fear of needles, EVERY time it’s over, it’s a reminder of how it’s all in my head.
If you find yourself without other options and in need of this procedure, fear not, because once you have a good doctor and let the process play out, the relief is something that can’t be explained. I no longer have to worry about my significant other drinking or feeling frisky, and becoming hopeful of something I can’t deliver. I’ll never feel again that I’m AFRAID this beautiful girl will like me enough to want to come home with me. Instead, my worries will be more about a concern, knowing what she’s in for, rather than sadness and disappointment about what used to be or could have been in my life.
This issue has plagued me tremendously. My wife walked out on us a couple years ago a day after I came home from my second heart attack. I still was able to perform naturally with the help of pills at that time, but after the second heart attack my body became advanced in its inabilities. Following this, I found myself single in my 30’s, for the first time in a decade. I had taken care of myself physically and don’t struggle to meet women. However, what I wrote off as flukes for a while became understood as my body losing its ability to get an erection. I had extreme feelings of loneliness after my divorce but had to play this game where I’d go on dates and then find an excuse to not follow up or ever take anyone up on their offer to come over or go back to my place.
During this time there were a couple girl that I really liked and fell for. But trying to start a new relationship while being unable to perform, in this age demographic, just doesn’t work. Try asking any 30ish woman in the dating world “okay, you find a great guy, checks the boxes, BUT, his penis doesn’t work...” we all know what the honest answer is. It’s the most defeating feeling. So after a couple failed relationships with wonderful people, it started to turn from loneliness and frustration to flat out depression. I tried everything and spent so much money. The p-shot plus GAINSwave, pills, supplements, testosterone, peptides, pelvic exercises, other stretches or holds...etc. I’d get massages to aid body circulation, cryotherapy to send blood flow to the surface... I literally tried EVERYTHING.
So now, having it done and being okay so far, when I think about fears or being terrified... having a couple weeks of soreness and pain, followed by better functionality than I had when I was 18 years old... the biggest fear I can think of, is going back to the lifestyle where I feared building relationships and was terrified that the hot chick I talked to may actually like me. But most of all, the terrifying feeling of going on like that for if not the rest of my life, at least through what still feels like a prime.
People who know me very well can see that I’m in pain from surgery, but they still say I look happier.
36yo, ED caused by unknown heart condition - two heart attacks - two stents - Finally taking the plunge after trying nearly everything available on the market. AMS 700 CX - 24cm - implanted on April 15, 2021
