Postby LastHope » Thu Mar 20, 2025 1:03 am
I’m a compulsive sex toy connoisseur. I'm the Indiana Jones of self-love gadgets. Human sex? It’s just a quirky boring side quest for me, for my sweeter than honey wifey.
I feel you. I can’t jab my dick with needles 5 times a day for my marathon wank-a-thons, my dick would look like a pincushion at a voodoo convention, so I said ‘yes’ to implants.
Some people are too young for those wonderful physiological inflatable German machines, and the thought of endless revisions will have me sweating like a nervous T-rex in a china shop.
I love my malleable, my cute, bendy and bouncy savior.
Only catch:
If you don’t have residual engorgement, you’re stuck with ‘skinny dick syndrome’, the horror of a pencil impersonating a sausage. If you don't have residual encorgement, take daily Tadalafil to puff up that leftover swagger, and if you’re craving extra girth, HA fillers are basically the Botox of boners. Get a touch up every year and you are good to go.
Think about this, no tube fracture, no pump migration, no 3rd ball, no reservoir herniation, no cylinder aneurysms, no-auto inflation, no fucking stuck pump, no leak, no surfboard dick syndrome, just endless malleable erosions, just kidding. If you are sized right and take good care, you don't have to worry about erosion.
I’d slap a ‘highly recommend’ sticker on my malleable, it’s the unsung hero I wish I’d snagged in my youth. They last longer than a vampire’s grudge and are perfect for the right weirdo, maybe you, maybe not, definitely me.
Good luck!
40, Coloplast Genesis, 1/2025, Dr. Christine, UCAL