Comfort vs Peace

The final frontier. Deciding when, if and how.
clayton2526
Posts: 34
Joined: Thu Dec 27, 2018 8:36 am

Comfort vs Peace

Postby clayton2526 » Fri Oct 04, 2019 11:24 am

Greeting my Brothers,

My challenge is I have spent a couple of hundred dollars trying to find underwear that provides comfort since my implant. After months, I have found that for me, brands such as David Archy do work best, the longer the better. Furthermore, to prevent that "buckling" affect and feel, I pump up approximately 6 or 7 times and I am happy.

The challenge, in this state of comfort, there is this bulge. My wife DOES NOT want me going out "revealing my private part". As I stated before, I do work with several women. I have glanced at some staring. Last evening we were at a function and she walked up to me while I was talking to someone, who was male, and pulled my knit shirt down trying to conceal my bulge. She feels I could do a better job concealing. If I totally deflate, then I have the discomfort of the butterfly bend AND the sensation my penis pressing inward.

Brothers, I would appreciate feedback on this one. I mentioned this before and it appeared to be implied the lack of professionalism. I work in a professional environment, as well as being a professional. However, I believe we can be naïve by pretending such situations do not exist.

Thanks!
63 years old. Implanted 12/04/2018 by Dr. Aaron Lentz at Duke Raleigh Hospital with Coloplast Titan 22 cm. ED for over 30 years. Used Viagra and Cialis, later injections, THEN Gainswave: ineffective.

Lost Sheep
Posts: 6144
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2016 11:16 pm

Re: Comfort vs Peace

Postby Lost Sheep » Fri Oct 04, 2019 12:46 pm

clayton2526 wrote:Greeting my Brothers,

My challenge is I have spent a couple of hundred dollars trying to find underwear that provides comfort since my implant. After months, I have found that for me, brands such as David Archy do work best, the longer the better. Furthermore, to prevent that "buckling" affect and feel, I pump up approximately 6 or 7 times and I am happy.

The challenge, in this state of comfort, there is this bulge. My wife DOES NOT want me going out "revealing my private part". As I stated before, I do work with several women. I have glanced at some staring. Last evening we were at a function and she walked up to me while I was talking to someone, who was male, and pulled my knit shirt down trying to conceal my bulge. She feels I could do a better job concealing. If I totally deflate, then I have the discomfort of the butterfly bend AND the sensation my penis pressing inward.

Brothers, I would appreciate feedback on this one. I mentioned this before and it appeared to be implied the lack of professionalism. I work in a professional environment, as well as being a professional. However, I believe we can be naïve by pretending such situations do not exist.

Thanks!

(edited to add) I do wear my penis pointed up. I am "blessed" with a penis that does not encroach on my belt buckle. If it were any longer, I could let it point a little off to the side, but there are some men who are too long to do anything but point down one's pants' leg. But I find pointing up works just fine.

Compression underwear (e.g. Spanks for men) might work. One FrankTalk member has even resorted to a women's control garments (e.g. panty girdle).

People who carry concealed firearms have to be concerned about their weapon "printing" through their clothes and the phrase "dress around the gun" is commonly the guiding principle in their wardrobe.

I often wonder that the word "codpiece" does not appear on FrankTalk (though that particular garment served to announce, rather than conceal) more often. I think I am the only one to have used the word. A "reverse codpiece" might provide you concealment (with the appearance that you need to lose some weight, though).

Good luck.

Second edit: I suppose, in extremis, one could resort to a gaff (the device professional female impersonators use to hide their genitals).
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gaff_(clothing)
Last edited by Lost Sheep on Fri Oct 04, 2019 8:01 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Lost Sheep
AMS LGX 18+3 Nov 6, 2017
Prostate Cancer 2023
READ OLD THREADS-ask better questions -better understand answers
Be part of your medical team
Document pre-op size-photos and written records
Pre-op VED therapy helps. Post-op is another matter

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Happy Toy
Posts: 1102
Joined: Fri May 11, 2018 9:30 am

Re: Comfort vs Peace

Postby Happy Toy » Fri Oct 04, 2019 2:10 pm

clayton2526 wrote:Greeting my Brothers,

My challenge is I have spent a couple of hundred dollars trying to find underwear that provides comfort since my implant. After months, I have found that for me, brands such as David Archy do work best, the longer the better. Furthermore, to prevent that "buckling" affect and feel, I pump up approximately 6 or 7 times and I am happy.

The challenge, in this state of comfort, there is this bulge. My wife DOES NOT want me going out "revealing my private part". As I stated before, I do work with several women. I have glanced at some staring. Last evening we were at a function and she walked up to me while I was talking to someone, who was male, and pulled my knit shirt down trying to conceal my bulge. She feels I could do a better job concealing. If I totally deflate, then I have the discomfort of the butterfly bend AND the sensation my penis pressing inward.

Brothers, I would appreciate feedback on this one. I mentioned this before and it appeared to be implied the lack of professionalism. I work in a professional environment, as well as being a professional. However, I believe we can be naïve by pretending such situations do not exist.

Thanks!


I like my budge, I never had one before my implant. Does you wife have nice breasts? Does she try to hide them? I say as long as you are not tenting I don't see anything wrong with people seeing that you are a man. I just wouldn't worry about it and would tell your wife not to worry about it ether. I ware gym shorts at the gym and when I'm sitting riding the bike, or are on some of the other equipment, if you look down there you are going to see my package, my wife has never said anything about it.
Just my opinion, good luck.
bulge 1.JPG
bulge 1.JPG (302.42 KiB) Viewed 2015 times
Implanted 6/26/2018, Coloplast Titan 20cm, no RTE'S, infra pubic, Dr. Rhee, Kaiser :o 8-) 79yrs., married 56 yrs. ED for over 20 yrs.

mikestap
Posts: 173
Joined: Sat Sep 01, 2012 12:19 pm
Location: Atlanta, GA

Re: Comfort vs Peace

Postby mikestap » Fri Oct 04, 2019 3:20 pm

Clayton,
My view on this is shaped by several discussions my wife and I have had. We are both conservative, live in Georgia, she her entire life, and [generally] guided by Christian values on our marriage and sexuality. Most germane to your situation is “she is mine and I am hers,”

I have a 22cm Titan and I also use David Archy underwear. As I am a few months longer with my implant than you, I can tell you the situation will improve.

One area we are different is I am comfortable without any pumping up after full deflation. I’ll add that I do experience regular “re-equilrium” of my implant systems after that deflation. My wife can see it through my pants.

Were I wearing gym shorts at the supermarket, this would be problematic. Khakis or Khaki shorts diminish the visual impact. Dark fabrics are better.

My wife only had to tell me once that I belonged to her and no other woman was to have any idea what she had. I have respected that since, with great reward.

My advice is we all know women are different from us, and you are fortunate, like me to have a woman who tells you her feelings. You will adapt and find comfort with dress modest enough to please your lover.

Best wishes,
Mike
64 Years. RALP 2013. Received 22cm Titan Dec 20, 2017 by Dr Hakky. See results at download/file.php?id=5320 and download/file.php?id=4754
Revision 3-25-21 24 cm XL No RTE

notaes
Posts: 523
Joined: Sat Mar 23, 2019 8:54 am

Re: Comfort vs Peace

Postby notaes » Fri Oct 04, 2019 5:52 pm

I don’t mind to say that if my wife had done what your did talking to a male friend I woulD have been pissed! With the problems I have experienced with my crotch area I for one am not going to be miserable just to satisfy someone. We all see breast thrower all over everything. I personally do not see any difference. We all know men have a penis and as long as you aren’t trying to be filthy trashy I wouldn’t Worry too much about you4 crotch especially while you are healing. You can bet if it was breast surgery they would see things differently. Hang in there!
66 yr old male married 36 yrs use trimix four yrs, cilais and Viagra. trimix work well developed scarring on both sides had implant 1/9/2020 at UT Med Ctr, Knoxville, TN Dr. John Lacy.

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NeedleD
Posts: 276
Joined: Thu Mar 17, 2016 4:35 pm
Location: Midwest

Re: Comfort vs Peace

Postby NeedleD » Fri Oct 04, 2019 6:02 pm

notaes wrote:I don’t mind to say that if my wife had done what your did talking to a male friend I woulD have been pissed! With the problems I have experienced with my crotch area I for one am not going to be miserable just to satisfy someone. We all see breast thrower all over everything. I personally do not see any difference. We all know men have a penis and as long as you aren’t trying to be filthy trashy I wouldn’t Worry too much about you4 crotch especially while you are healing. You can bet if it was breast surgery they would see things differently. Hang in there!


I don't have an Implant but due to my xlarge testes I've always had a bulge. I fly almost every week and notice people looking at it. It doesn't bother me as there is nothing I can do about it. I'm waiting to get a Titan and when I do things are going to get a little crowded!
Use Super Quadmix due to severe Venous leak.Have a GREAT DAY!

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Quincy
Posts: 413
Joined: Tue Mar 27, 2012 6:03 pm
Location: Boise, ID

Re: Comfort vs Peace

Postby Quincy » Fri Oct 04, 2019 6:33 pm

While the David Archy 2-pouch underwear are the most comfortable for me, they do put the penis out in front. The sleeve for the dick keeps it in place and provides more comfort, but makes the bulge more prominent. That said, I often wear them both with slacks and gym shorts. I've never noticed anyone looking, but I guess I'm just oblivious to it.

When I wear them, I'm not trying to be on display, but I am trying to be comfortable. My feeling is that if it's comfortable, and I don't purposely try to show off the bulge with tight pants, etc., then I'm fine with the bulge being there. IMO, men should be allowed to be comfortable.

I've had my AMS implant for over a year and I don't put any pumps into it after deflation, they simply aren't needed for comfort. You may find that when you've had your implant longer it will be more flexible and won't need the extra pumps.

If you're really looking to hide the bulge, I've found that compression shorts or a regular jock, pointing the penis up, do the job. They just aren't as comfy.

Good luck.
Quincy.
71, Boise area, Married
ED from type 2 diabetes and PCa radiation.
AMS LGX surgery 6/5/18 with Edward Karpman in Silicon Valley, 18cm+3RTE

mikestap
Posts: 173
Joined: Sat Sep 01, 2012 12:19 pm
Location: Atlanta, GA

Re: Comfort vs Peace

Postby mikestap » Sat Oct 05, 2019 12:34 am

I’d add that we are quick to seek fairness in comparing women’s breasts to our penises on the issue. I don’t think that’s an accurate analogy.

What might be fairer is to consider how we would feel if our wives walked around sporting a very apparent cameltoe... in a semi-aroused state.
64 Years. RALP 2013. Received 22cm Titan Dec 20, 2017 by Dr Hakky. See results at download/file.php?id=5320 and download/file.php?id=4754
Revision 3-25-21 24 cm XL No RTE

Evinrude
Posts: 214
Joined: Sun May 05, 2019 4:02 pm
Location: SC

Re: Comfort vs Peace

Postby Evinrude » Sat Oct 05, 2019 1:25 pm

Happy Toy wrote:[
I like my budge, I never had one before my implant. Does you wife have nice breasts? Does she try to hide them? I say as long as you are not tenting I don't see anything wrong with people seeing that you are a man. I just wouldn't worry about it and would tell your wife not to worry about it ether. I ware gym shorts at the gym and when I'm sitting riding the bike, or are on some of the other equipment, if you look down there you are going to see my package, my wife has never said anything about it.
Just my opinion, good luck.bulge 1.JPG


I'm trying to figure out how you pee wearing those pants ;)
Age 68, widower in 2017, remarried 2019. Viagra worked at first but less and less so as time went on. Never tried injections. AMS 700 LGX 15cm (2cm RTE) Implant 6/19/19 Broderick @ Mayo C. JAX.

3rd-Nut
Posts: 154
Joined: Fri Feb 07, 2014 5:05 pm

Re: Comfort vs Peace

Postby 3rd-Nut » Sun Oct 06, 2019 11:43 am

Clayton,
I have the problem of mine snaking slightly to the left of the bottom of my pants crotch. I wear very loose underwear. I have a hard time visualizing your problem. Maybe you could post a pic of you in your pants.
I had a hydrocele in my late 30's, where one nut was about 3x the normal. I did get many stares from women ogling my crotch, many of them much older than me. I remember one in particular, came into the waiting room I was in and looked at me. She then looked at my crotch, saw the bulge, then looked me straight in the eyes. I really blushed.
I then knew what women felt like when men stare at their breasts.
I go for comfort.
PC 2006, AMS 700 LGX implanted 18+3, 2012, Dr. Paolone in Madison, WI- Married 47 yrs.


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