My Last Post

The final frontier. Deciding when, if and how.

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defiant
Posts: 337
Joined: Mon Apr 25, 2016 9:35 am

My Last Post

Postby defiant » Sat Mar 02, 2019 6:38 pm

Okay so that’s rather click-baitey but this will be my last entry here - at least until a day comes that I do sign on the dotted line and schedule for an implant.

But I need your guys’ help. Reassurance more than anything.

I won’t go into my EDs aetiology - that’s in my signature anyway. But my ED is predominantly and all the doctors and tests would say, totally 100% mental.

But is sex not the most mental of acts there is. And is the brain not part of your body. So really; what’s the difference.

Pills have always worked for me but in recent months it’s become very hit and miss, and this is where I really need your advice, support and reassurance. My relationship with sex is deteriorating massively. I fear it, so I shy from it and when I have it, I find it hard to cum now because I’m worrying so much and that can, as has just happened one hour ago, lead to me being unable to get in the mood and even want it.

Has this happened to anyone here? Did it get so bad that the thought of sex wasn’t really doing it for you anymore? Were you shying from it? And when and if you got going, did you find it hard to cum from all the overthinking?

My primary fear now is that even the implant won’t solve my problem and that I will suffer anorgasmia for the rest of my life.

I try to tell myself that my problem’s core is the fear of losing an erection or getting hard in the first place and that with this fear gone, I’ll begin to connect with my body and joy and love for sex again. But I do fear that that relationship has been permanently damaged.

Can anyone here sympathies and perhaps allay my fears?

The implant is now firmly on my radar. I think I know all there is to know now about the pros and cons. But right now, all I want to know is, will I ever have care-free and enjoyable sex again?!

Thank you, all.
35 y.o, mild to moderate ED since 21, 3 Dopplers with 1 result of VL & 3 later results of NO physical problem, critically dependent on cialis (efficacy now waning), overcame Lymophoma at 26, ED causing immense & profound psychological distress

ED2013
Posts: 1171
Joined: Tue Mar 05, 2013 8:15 pm

Re: My Last Post

Postby ED2013 » Sat Mar 02, 2019 6:59 pm

Ed nearly destroyed my life. It was living hell. I had many of the feelings you describe. Don’t worry. I now have an awesome sex life. You will have an awesome sex life in the future as well. Hang in there.
Ams 700 cx. Dr Karpman.

defiant
Posts: 337
Joined: Mon Apr 25, 2016 9:35 am

Re: My Last Post

Postby defiant » Sat Mar 02, 2019 7:02 pm

ED2013 wrote:Ed nearly destroyed my life. It was living hell. I had many of the feelings you describe. Don’t worry. I now have an awesome sex life. You will have an awesome sex life in the future as well. Hang in there.


I really hope so man. Because what good will the implant even be if I can’t cum to completion.
35 y.o, mild to moderate ED since 21, 3 Dopplers with 1 result of VL & 3 later results of NO physical problem, critically dependent on cialis (efficacy now waning), overcame Lymophoma at 26, ED causing immense & profound psychological distress

ED2013
Posts: 1171
Joined: Tue Mar 05, 2013 8:15 pm

Re: My Last Post

Postby ED2013 » Sat Mar 02, 2019 7:56 pm

defiant wrote:
ED2013 wrote:Ed nearly destroyed my life. It was living hell. I had many of the feelings you describe. Don’t worry. I now have an awesome sex life. You will have an awesome sex life in the future as well. Hang in there.


I really hope so man. Because what good will the implant even be if I can’t cum to completion.



You’ll be fine. Believe me.
Ams 700 cx. Dr Karpman.

defiant
Posts: 337
Joined: Mon Apr 25, 2016 9:35 am

Re: My Last Post

Postby defiant » Sun Mar 03, 2019 2:36 am

ED2013 wrote:
defiant wrote:
ED2013 wrote:Ed nearly destroyed my life. It was living hell. I had many of the feelings you describe. Don’t worry. I now have an awesome sex life. You will have an awesome sex life in the future as well. Hang in there.


I really hope so man. Because what good will the implant even be if I can’t cum to completion.



You’ll be fine. Believe me.


Thanks man.

Did you ever have that feeling I’m describing where sex became more about the mental fight of ‘will it stay up and am I gonna cum in time’ vs just having fun?
35 y.o, mild to moderate ED since 21, 3 Dopplers with 1 result of VL & 3 later results of NO physical problem, critically dependent on cialis (efficacy now waning), overcame Lymophoma at 26, ED causing immense & profound psychological distress

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Lunatech
Posts: 88
Joined: Wed Nov 28, 2018 2:07 pm
Location: Foothills of NC

Re: My Last Post

Postby Lunatech » Sun Mar 03, 2019 7:21 am

defiant wrote:Did you ever have that feeling I’m describing where sex became more about the mental fight of ‘will it stay up and am I gonna cum in time’ vs just having fun?


I've been having that mental fight since my early 30's. Now at 49 (this summer) I've finally done something about it, gotten my implant. Using VED and constriction rings there are times I could get hard enough for sex but sometimes never climaxed myself. All my ED issues really took a toll on my wife and I over the years. We were just laying in bed this morning looking and my swollen, bruised and sore/aching junk and talking about how much better it will be with the implant once the healing is over, how many more positions we can try not having to worry about me going soft, and how much CONFIDENCE I'll have with the implant. I've always been very hard on myself to make sure my wife was pleased in the sexual department. So much so that I REALLY beat myself up when I couldn't stay erect enough for sex. Now I know the implant isn't going to put me back to what/where I was in my 20's but it will be a new normal that will take some getting used to. Now I can't tell you what it is like having an implant past Day 4 (where I am now) but I can see it will be a game changer having to never worry about staying erect again. As far as me worrying about my orgasm, never again. I'm gonna focus on having fun with my wife and the rest will come (pun intended :D )
49 years old, Suffering from ED 10+ years, Implant surgery 2/28/19 AMS 700 LGX 18cm with 4cm RTE by Dr. Terlecki at WFBMC in Winston Salem NC

defiant
Posts: 337
Joined: Mon Apr 25, 2016 9:35 am

Re: My Last Post

Postby defiant » Sun Mar 03, 2019 7:53 am

Lunatech wrote:
defiant wrote:Did you ever have that feeling I’m describing where sex became more about the mental fight of ‘will it stay up and am I gonna cum in time’ vs just having fun?


I've been having that mental fight since my early 30's. Now at 49 (this summer) I've finally done something about it, gotten my implant. Using VED and constriction rings there are times I could get hard enough for sex but sometimes never climaxed myself. All my ED issues really took a toll on my wife and I over the years. We were just laying in bed this morning looking and my swollen, bruised and sore/aching junk and talking about how much better it will be with the implant once the healing is over, how many more positions we can try not having to worry about me going soft, and how much CONFIDENCE I'll have with the implant. I've always been very hard on myself to make sure my wife was pleased in the sexual department. So much so that I REALLY beat myself up when I couldn't stay erect enough for sex. Now I know the implant isn't going to put me back to what/where I was in my 20's but it will be a new normal that will take some getting used to. Now I can't tell you what it is like having an implant past Day 4 (where I am now) but I can see it will be a game changer having to never worry about staying erect again. As far as me worrying about my orgasm, never again. I'm gonna focus on having fun with my wife and the rest will come (pun intended :D )


Thank you so much for the reply!

And I am so so thrilled for you and your wife. I hope that it brings you as much happiness as we all know it can bring.

I think I’m suffering right now with an innate fear of sex and women and that has led me to really not want sex and to regard it as something that causes trauma.

And I just don’t know what can bring me out of that.

This all stems from ED so I am hopeful that that problem being fixed will restore the rest and then some. I have such a promising future ahead but this just kills literally everything.
35 y.o, mild to moderate ED since 21, 3 Dopplers with 1 result of VL & 3 later results of NO physical problem, critically dependent on cialis (efficacy now waning), overcame Lymophoma at 26, ED causing immense & profound psychological distress

ED2013
Posts: 1171
Joined: Tue Mar 05, 2013 8:15 pm

Re: My Last Post

Postby ED2013 » Sun Mar 03, 2019 7:53 am

defiant wrote:
ED2013 wrote:
defiant wrote:
I really hope so man. Because what good will the implant even be if I can’t cum to completion.



You’ll be fine. Believe me.


Thanks man.

Did you ever have that feeling I’m describing where sex became more about the mental fight of ‘will it stay up and am I gonna cum in time’ vs just having fun?



Yes. I completely understand.
Ams 700 cx. Dr Karpman.

defiant
Posts: 337
Joined: Mon Apr 25, 2016 9:35 am

Re: My Last Post

Postby defiant » Sun Mar 03, 2019 8:08 am

ED2013 wrote:
defiant wrote:
ED2013 wrote:

You’ll be fine. Believe me.


Thanks man.

Did you ever have that feeling I’m describing where sex became more about the mental fight of ‘will it stay up and am I gonna cum in time’ vs just having fun?



Yes. I completely understand.


And you recovered your mind and positive relationship with sex?
35 y.o, mild to moderate ED since 21, 3 Dopplers with 1 result of VL & 3 later results of NO physical problem, critically dependent on cialis (efficacy now waning), overcame Lymophoma at 26, ED causing immense & profound psychological distress

ED2013
Posts: 1171
Joined: Tue Mar 05, 2013 8:15 pm

Re: My Last Post

Postby ED2013 » Sun Mar 03, 2019 8:16 am

defiant wrote:
ED2013 wrote:
defiant wrote:
Thanks man.

Did you ever have that feeling I’m describing where sex became more about the mental fight of ‘will it stay up and am I gonna cum in time’ vs just having fun?



Yes. I completely understand.


And you recovered your mind and positive relationship with sex?


Yes 100 percent.
Ams 700 cx. Dr Karpman.


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