First sex - awful

[Kodixx]

Osprey_1, I'm sorry to hear about your situation. I agree with others who said that 6 weeks is too early to draw conclusions. Nerves get unsettled during surgery and it can take months for them to recover. That said, its easy to get overcome with negative thoughts and fear. There are a lot of stories in this forum about time needed for sensitivity to return, and yes some about continuing challenges. Certainly you want to focus on what does work -- the restored ability to have sex. The ability to do it worry free, on demand, and for as long as you and your gf want. While you wait for full sensitivity to return, you may want your gf to try some other means, besides PIV, to "get you there" as others in the forum have described. And, that may help with her concerns about knowing that she's able to "do it for you".

In addition, you might consider other steps to make the most of the sensitivity you are feeling. I offer this with the caveat that, as with everything -- check with your Dr before doing anything to know what's best for you.

I found a THC/CBD product that heightens libido and magnifies sensitivity. It's effect is very predictable. Starts at about 20 minutes with 80% at about an hour. It lasts around 6-8 hours. Following the "start low, go slow" mantra, I started at 3 fluid ounces which is 6mg of both THC and CBD (25mg per can), but I'm new at this. It felt like 2 or 3 shots, relaxing, and mainly increases libido. Below is a URL for the 25mg dose of the product. Be aware that the product is sold in other doses.
https://greenlightdispensary.com/rock-port-menu/?geo-redirected=true&dtche%5Bproduct%5D=blackberry-coconut-sparkling-1-1-h2o-25mg

For a stronger libido & sensitivity boost I've used PT-141 many times. It's a SubQ injectable - you'll want to Google that if you don't know what that is. It is very low risk since it goes just under the skin. I take with low dose Ondansetron (Zofran) to avoid any nausea. Oddly it takes about 6-8 hours before it kicks in completely, but I feel the effect for 18+ hours.

- Chuck

I’ve lost sensation in about 3/4 of my penis. The entire left side is numb. On the right side, there is feeling towards the top, underneath the glans penis. Apparently, it’s not enough to signal my brain for an orgasm.

[Discovernew]

I’ve lost sensation in about 3/4 of my penis. The entire left side is numb. On the right side, there is feeling towards the top, underneath the glans penis. Apparently, it’s not enough to signal my brain for an orgasm. I’m trying to envision a life without happy endings right now. My doctor simply says, sensation “should” return. It’s not reassuring. I know I should just be patient … and I would be if I felt confident that the feeling will return at some point. But in the dead of night, when all the negative thoughts come flooding out, I see myself going through life with a rock hard dick that is totally useless. It’s a mind thing, I know. I just need to know that this is temporary. When you’ve had cancer and experienced setback after setback, it’s hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I just want my life back.

I know that in surgeries in general (not just this one), lost sensation can take 3-6months to come back. If i were you i would just not worry too much until that day actually comes.

That being said, did the doctor give an explanation about what could have caused this?

[ragingbull]

I’ve lost sensation in about 3/4 of my penis. The entire left side is numb. On the right side, there is feeling towards the top, underneath the glans penis. Apparently, it’s not enough to signal my brain for an orgasm. I’m trying to envision a life without happy endings right now. My doctor simply says, sensation “should” return. It’s not reassuring. I know I should just be patient … and I would be if I felt confident that the feeling will return at some point. But in the dead of night, when all the negative thoughts come flooding out, I see myself going through life with a rock hard dick that is totally useless. It’s a mind thing, I know. I just need to know that this is temporary. When you’ve had cancer and experienced setback after setback, it’s hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I just want my life back.

I know that in surgeries in general (not just this one), lost sensation can take 3-6months to come back. If i were you i would just not worry too much until that day actually comes.

That being said, did the doctor give an explanation about what could have caused this?

3-6 months is your standard text book reassurance and surgical sales gimmick. No luck here even after that.

[Mark1974]

3-6 months is your standard text book reassurance and surgical sales gimmick. No luck here even after that.

Do you get any glans engorgement?

What mm in width are the rods?

Is it a Genesis?

[Mark1974]

One comment really got to me. My girlfriend said,”when I have sex with a guy, I get him hard and I know he’s turned on. That turns me on. You pump it up. It all seems so mechanical. Are you just going through the motions?”


I don’t know how to overcome this one. She says that having sex with a guy with an implant isn’t weird, but apparently it is for her.

Is she close to your age?

Also do you pump to about 80% instead of 100%? It seems a lower percentage is good for a lot of guys in terms of sensation.

You had an RP and that alone will make orgasm more difficult, but you said you were able to achieve it after the RP and before surgery.

It's possible that you will never orgasm from vaginal sex again, but I think with time you will probably be able to orgasm from masturbation.

One more consideration is that you are not oversized

[tomas1]

I was wondering the same thing. I wonder if they cut a nerve.

[Mark1974]

I was wondering the same thing. I wonder if they cut a nerve.

My understanding is that he had a penoscrotal operation, so the chances of cutting a nerve are less than the infrapubic. But I am not a physician, so who knows

Osprey I would start investigating getting a second opinion. If you are in Florida there are guys down in Miami who are very well respected for this procedure. Maybe book an appt and go spend a couple of nights down there to help ease your mind

[CanGetItUpButNotOff]

I know I should just be patient … and I would be if I felt confident that the feeling will return at some point. But in the dead of night, when all the negative thoughts come flooding out, I see myself going through life with a rock hard dick that is totally useless. It’s a mind thing, I know.

My problem is not a new implant but just declining sensitivity that results in a failed orgasm of about one out of every five times. I know this isn't so bad but, in the moment, I see only the negativity. My brain rationalizes that the day will come when there are no more orgasms and maybe that day was today. But then, I'll have an orgasm and all is right with the world. It's hard to describe how devastating it is to see your manhood trickle away.

[NewGuy2025]

My girlfriend said,”when I have sex with a guy, I get him hard and I know he’s turned on. That turns me on. You pump it up. It all seems so mechanical. Are you just going through the motions?”

That is toxic to the max and lacks empathy.
Ask her how she would feel if she didn't get wet and you had to use lube and then tell her the same thing and ask her the same thing.

Better get separated.

[wolfpacker]

My girlfriend said,”when I have sex with a guy, I get him hard and I know he’s turned on. That turns me on. You pump it up. It all seems so mechanical. Are you just going through the motions?”

That is toxic to the max and lacks empathy.
Ask her how she would feel if she didn't get wet and you had to use lube and then tell her the same thing and ask her the same thing.

Better get separated.

No kidding, I would kick her to the curb so fast lol. Lots of fish in the sea