Last sleep before the big day. Possibly a journal.

[Kodixx]

Kiwias, congrats to you ! What a great comeback story !!!

- Chuck

FrankTalk Journal – Post-Op Day 11 Something remarkable has happened over the last four days: after years of low-to-no sex drive, my libido has come roaring back like I’m 25 again. Grateful doesn’t even begin to cover it. More updates soon.

[Kiwias]

Week 2 Update

Week 1 was textbook surgical recovery.
Week 2 felt like getting parts of myself back that I hadn’t felt in years.
Here’s the full update for anyone following the journal or preparing for their own surgery.

Physical recovery

Swelling & Pain

Swelling is now minimal , often completely gone for long stretches.
Pain is basically just “awareness” now. No real discomfort unless I’m in an odd position.
The one persistent issue from Week 1 (a pinching feeling at the left underside/base) has mostly disappeared. I occasionally wake with it at night but I think this is just positional as I let everything hang freely.

Incision

Dry, behaving perfectly, glue beginning to crack and lift as expected.
Skin around it moves freely, no tethering or tightness.

Nerves

This was the most interesting physical change of the week. I had: -

ventral twinges

occasional “electrical flick” sensations

pin-pricks in the scrotal skin

deep urethral stretch sensations

an itch-like feeling inside the glans

Even though the outer surface of the glans is still mostly numb, I can feel inside it, including the pressure from the cylinder tips sitting about halfway in. This is exactly what my natural anatomy felt like, only firmer.
Sensation is returning in waves, not all at once.

Implant feel

The cylinders are noticeably softening (in the good way). Crinkling is much less apparent and
the device bends more naturally.

Bend resistance varies by direction:

Both left and down: bends easily

up: mild resistance

right: moderate/strong resistance and wants to buckle

From what I understand, this is normal early behavior as tissues loosen in some planes faster than others.

Measurements

Like everyone on this forum I have gotten a little obsessed with measurements. These are difficult to get correct at the moment as due to the scar as I can't really do an accurate bone pressed. However on an inaccurate side measure length has bounced between 5.5 and 6.5. it changes day by day increases then decreases then increases again. I'm not going to bother with it again until I can pump and deflate, then I'll have a better idea of the erect and flaccid outcomes, not this intermediate semi erect state.
Girth measured midshaft 4.5 inches at Day 15. This is right between my natural and VED girths immediately pre surgery
Also it's without cycling, without full inflation, and without the final healed shape. So very pleased with that. And hopefully as I have a Titan it will continue to improve.

Miscellaneous

I found a couple of soft, mobile, rubbery lumps in the scrotum. They move freely and vanish when I stop looking for them. Almost certainly fat lobules or healing tissue. They are not painful, not attached to anything, and not
concerning.

The pump

This seems to have settled left of centre, below and behind my left testicle. I'm completely unaware of it at all times. The position is good for both left or right hand pumping. I'm slightly ambidextrous and from my current exploration of the device I think I will prefer to pump left-handed and deflate with my right hand. I'm not envisioning any issues when it comes to activation as I have already had a couple of naughty micro pumps with either hand to test things out. I can also clearly locate and feel the deflate button and this feels comfortable to grip and press with my right hand. I haven't attempted to deflate. The only possible issue is that I can feel some sort of soft squishy tissue attached to a small spot on the top ridge of the pump. This is a little bit painful in a pinchy sort of way when I press on it. It's easy to avoid and hopefully it will dissolve or disappear with time.

Sexual function and libido

This is where Week 2 took a dramatic turn for the better.

Libido

Around Day 9–10, something just “switched back on.”
After years of diminished desire post-prostatectomy, I suddenly felt horny again, consistent, daily, urgent, and frankly enjoyable.
I’ve been touching my wife at every opportunity, and she’s loving the attention.

Sensation

Still numb in areas, but:

I can absolutely feel warmth, pressure, and pleasure from oral and manual stimulation

I can feel early twinges of sexual sensation in the shaft and base

Glans responded to suction by partially engorging and staying that way afterward

Pelvic muscle contraction moves the penis normally again


I have not tried to orgasm. I can definitely feel the early signals at the base of my shaft and in my loins, but I doubt I that with the current numbness that I would be able finish yet. That will come with healing.

Oral/Manual Stimulation

My wife has been giving me gentle oral several times a day (her idea now as much as mine):

gentle suction

licking

stroking the shaft

massaging the scrotum

using her mouth on the glans

All perfectly safe at this stage, and deeply reassuring to both of us.
Everything feels normal to me, despite the reduced surface sensation.
She can feel the pump slightly and 2 small Peyronie’s plaque lumps on the left side, but says none of it feels bad or off-putting, just different.

Non-thrusting penetration

This was the emotional highlight of the week.

Last night we ended up in a kneeling missionary position and she guided me inside her.
We stayed connected for a couple of minutes, no thrusting, no pressure, just closeness.
It felt familiar in a way I wasn’t expecting. Like reconnecting with an old part of our relationship we’d missed for years.
Later, in a spooning position, I slid in again while she masturbated herself.
Still no thrusting, just comfortable, beautiful intimacy.
No pain, no strain, and we both found it incredibly affirming.
We won’t attempt real intercourse until cleared, but these moments have done wonders for our confidence and connection.

Emotional state

Honestly, I feel better than I have in years.There’s something incredibly healing about: -

libido returning

sensation returning

being able to pleasure my wife again

her being excited, involved, and affectionate

the feeling of “we’re doing this together”

Instead of sex becoming distant or out of bounds as we wait for healing, it’s become more present, frequent and abundant than it’s been in a decade.
We’re touching more, laughing more, talking more.
She told me she’s loving the increased intimacy and wants this new chapter with me.
That alone would have made Week 2 a success even without all the physical improvements.

Two weeks in: My overall impression

I genuinely feel like I’m ahead of the typical curve.

Sensation returning earlier than expected

Swelling nearly gone

Minimal pain

Libido back

Early, safe sexual contact already possible

Emotional connection strengthened

Girth already improved

Device softening and feeling more natural

Able to see the clear shape and future potential of the implant

And cycling is still a week away.
If Week 3 is anything like Week 2, this is going to be one hell of a journey.
I’ll update again after activation, or sooner if something interesting happens.
Happy to answer any questions for guys preparing for surgery.

[Kiwias]

I forgot to mention the tubes. Once the swelling had subsided I could clearly feel both tubes on either side of my penis, tracking down into my scrotum. They felt large and hard. I was not to concerned and felt that this was something I could adapt to and live with.
Then a couple of days ago they appeared to completely disappear. In reality they haven't gone but have settled deeper into the tissue and just feel like part of my regular anatomy. No way would they be noticeable by anyone, including myself as I really have to probe deeply to locate them.