Did you tell your partner? Why? How?

[wolfpacker]

I've told some girls, kept it secret from some. The ones I told are all 30s and they were of course very cool with it

Thanks! Just out of curiosity, what was the reason why you would tell some and some other not? Was it based on the girl personality (the more mature, the more you felt like telling) or was it the type of relationship (the more serious, the more you felt like telling)?

Mostly the second one, I would tell her if we'd had sex a few times and was considering a relationship. Other girls I'd told were if I was caught sexually off guard (she starts sucking my dick in bed in the morning and I'm mysteriously not getting hard) so had to spill the beans in order to proceed getting our morning delight on.

[Wodjathat]

To tell or not tell. I guess it’s a choice and there is no right or wrong answer. It’s what you choose.

I also hear the mantra quite often that most women don’t care. How does the saying go- ‘a good man is hard to find and a hard man is good to find’.

I’m only 3 weeks post op and have not used it yet. I only have one testicle so its little bro sits right next to it. Fits nicely if that makes sense but it is different. Right now its feels like a little round rock.

The way I see things there is no way whatsoever they could not notice unless you said don’t touch my balls. But that just me. May be different for you guys that have your 3rd nut behind the other two.

[ready2go]

Hi All,
I’m currently considering getting an implant and was curious to hear if everyone here openly communicated to their partner about getting or already having an implant.
I (37yo) am in a 3 months relationship with a (30yo) girl and things are getting pretty serious, but I am debating whether I should either hide it as a minor vascular surgery like varicocele (justifying the pump as a post-op cyst or stent), or fully disclose it this early in the relationship. Any advice would be immensely appreciated.

me ? no , nope ,nada . in the year i have had the malleable . and had 4 women . the 4rth was my wife after she returned from a years absence , i told none of them and will not
each to their own .its there for the girls to enjoy that's all they need to know . Of the 4 , one asked me "why does your dick not sleep ?"
i smiled and pushed it down further
they ride ,they cum .they are happy . the end .

Thanks for sharing! I can totally understand your approach and sympathize with the idea that we’re not necessarily obligated to share the burden of a minor (non-life threatening) health issue with our partner.

It’s great to hear that even with something as noticeable as the malleable (which I imagine is much harder to conceal), you managed to navigate it successfully in a long-term relationship.

Any specific reasons why you went for a malleable instead of an inflatable? I always thought that malleables would be easier to spot as they would bend more easily if manipulated in a certain way by your partner. Is that not the case? Thanks again!

yeah 2 reasons , one i didn't want to have to pump up. and i first read of malleables being hard 24/7 and thought that would be great .
second , the malfunctions ,plus all that hardware inside . i dont want to deal with all that

[Stevie Reno]

If you’re serious I’d have a heart to heart talk with her and tell her the truth…you already have an active sex life with her so her input should factor into your decision.

You won’t be able to hide getting an implant so it would be better to talk ahead of time.

[dan_bionic]

Hi All,
I’m currently considering getting an implant and was curious to hear if everyone here openly communicated to their partner about getting or already having an implant.
I (37yo) am in a 3 months relationship with a (30yo) girl and things are getting pretty serious, but I am debating whether I should either hide it as a minor vascular surgery like varicocele (justifying the pump as a post-op cyst or stent), or fully disclose it this early in the relationship. Any advice would be immensely appreciated.

snake_jazzer,
if you have already a good relation-ship with great sex, the implant will make your sexual experience even much better, for both of you.
Tell her and talk with her, she will understand and support you, for sure.

I have lost around 40 years for 4 asexual marriages and ED, got divorced from the last wife and got to be with a 22 yo girl, we had great sex with pills, then I got a mini stroke and viagra was not an option anymore. She and I were speaking about an implant and decided even together to ge one. She helped me through the recovery period, she was so hot about the implant, that we had oral sex after 14 days and vaginal after 20 days post implant and the first six months we hade the best sex of our both lives. Unfortunately she had to live to another city to study and I found my way with dating young chicks.

In fact my young hottie was the reason I decided and got implanted very fast.
Go ahead and talk with her, don't hide it, you'll have easier time with her knowing it and I'm sure she will support it!
Dan

[LetoMan]

You are in a somewhat unique situation, as most of us are either in committed relationships when we get it, or, like me, are single and playing the field.

I think the married/committed guys will almost all tell you you have to be honest about it, and almost all of us single guys would tell you to virtually never disclose it up front and that girls can’t tell anyway.

But you are unique. Your dick, and the way you have sex, will be very, very different after you recover from surgery, which will be a month or two.

I don’t think girls accept the idea of you recovering for a month and then suddenly having a super dick without being curious. They are not going to buy a silly white lie. And silly white lies grow and compound.

I think you are best off a) waiting until your surgery date is set and you are committed, and b) telling her the honest truth, and answering all her questions.

Here are the possible outcomes: most likely, she is very accepting and supportive, and you are not living in fear of “discovery”, and you fuck twice daily for the rest of your lives. Or, she is not supportive, in which case you have learned the truth about her and are better off without her anyway. Once your dick heals you bang every single woman in a 50 mile radius (and a few that are not single), find the one that suits you the best and appreciates your super dick, and live happily ever after.

Those are both win/win scenarios. But if you are not upfront with her, the bad outcome is that she turns out to be “the one” but the white lie festers and when she discovers the truth she felt you misled her.

There is no way she is going to accept that you are getting major surgery without having questions. And when you don’t have good answers to those questions… problems start. You don’t need to show up with charts and diagrams, but I would be honest and prepared to answer all her questions.

I’ve not had any woman out of the 50+ I’ve been with even suspect anything, even the ones I’ve been with with many times. But as far as they know I’ve always had a super dick. If I was entering into a relationship, I would probably disclose it after a while, because healthy relationships generally mean not having secrets. Again, if they are not cool with it, what use are they in a relationship anyway?

Be well, Leto

[snake_jazzer]

Thank you very much, Dan and Leto. I really appreciate you, as your perspective is super useful.

However, how would you phrase it? Given that she’s a 30-year-old woman prone to anxiety, I’d like to put it in the most casual and unconcerning way possible, if that makes sense.

Going too medical with terms like “erectile dysfunction,” “implant,” or “pump between testicles” would, I’m sure, freak a lot of people out. I understand the value of being fully transparent, but I also don’t want to drop a huge shock on someone who might not be able to handle it, and catapult them into a surreal situation from one moment to the next.

Probably something like:
“I’ve got a pretty common circulation issue down there that would cause problems later in life if I left it untreated, so I decided to finally get it sorted. It’s a very common procedure: they’ll replace two faulty veins and add a tiny sack that fills them when needed. It’s all inside, so you’d never even know it’s there. It’ll keep everything working perfectly, for life. It might only need a quick replacement every 5–10 years. I just wanted to mention it out of honesty and trust in you, even if it’s very personal.”

[LetoMan]

Well, only you know her, so none of us can really tell you how to discuss it with her in a way that addresses her anxiety and personal quirks. All that I am trying to note is that if she is led to believe that it is a minor issue, she may feel misled when she finds out it’s a bigger issue. Literally… your uninflated cock is going to be a lot bigger, and inflated it could be too. It’s going to feel a A LOT different inside her. It’s going to look different. There is going to be a six months to one year adjustment period, and everything about how you have sex is likely to change, from the positions you enjoy to how you orgasm. YOU are likely to change, too. Maybe she reacts to all that change by saying “oh, that’s just because he got his vein fixed.” I don’t know her, so I don’t know.

And so that is really the question for you that none of us can answer. Is she likely to accept the played-down version despite evidence to the contrary? Or is she more likely to feel misled… and how does that feed into her anxiety? Again, none of us can answer those questions for you.

All that I can try to convey to you is that it is EXTREMELY unlikely she simply doesn’t notice. I often tell guys here they don’t have to worry about girls figuring out that they have an implant. But that’s girls that weren’t with them before! You are going to go from ED Clark Kent to the Man of Steel. Many of the girls I am with ask me what my secret is to being super hard on demand all the time for as long as I want. They definitely notice THAT… they just don’t figure out it is due to an implant, they think I was just born that way. But your girl won’t have the ability to believe that, because she is already familiar with your johnson.

And then there is you. You are going to be changed, especially as a relatively young, long time sufferer. I’ve been listening to a lot of guys on here over the past year react to their new bionic dicks. As far as I can tell, almost no one is like “eh” and goes on with their lives. Instead, most are like “this is fucking amazing!” and proceed to bang every woman in sight, and is a minority of cases they are like “what the fuck have I done?!?!?” But to be honest, almost every guy has a few WTF moments, especially in the first few weeks. How is your relationship going to navigate those moments when you might need/want support, but you are hiding what you are going through (and possibly hiding your swollen, black and blue dick as you recover)?

All of this is just to say: without knowing her, I will say that generally speaking, it is very unlikely that you can postpone a more in-depth conversation for long. Maybe she just sticks her head in the sand, but more likely she eventually figures out what happened (or worse, can’t figure out what happened, but knows you are being evasive and weird about all the changes you are going through). I can’t tell you how she’ll feel at that point, but it is unlikely you can pretend forever that you just got a minor vein fixed.

Good luck figuring it out, man.

Leto

[snake_jazzer]

Thank you so much Leto, extremely helpful advise.

If you don’t mind, what are the parts that you would rephrase or add, in order to avoid the risk of her feeling misled? Consider that it’s only been 3 months that we are together, and we only see each other every 10 days or so. We may have slept together 40/50 times in which I was 100% erect and ready to go. Sometimes I went for 2 and even 3 rounds (at crazy high dosages, of course) and I lost erection only twice of those times, so sex was pretty good and consistent at this point so I thought there shouldn’t be too much difference to what she is used to, as far as performance goes.

But yes she would definitely notice the structural differences, but I thought my casual phrasing above should cover most of it. But of course, if she digs deeper and asks more specific questions, I would certainly add as many details and medical terms as she needs.

For example, if she point blank asks “was this for erections specifically?”, then I would say “yes, especially to prevent loss of function in older age” or something along those lines. If she asks “so is this an implant/prosthesis?” I would say “yes, just like a boobjob is”. If she aks “so you can only have erections artificially now?” I would say “you still have natural engorgement, but you don’t have to rely on that alone anymore, especially in older years when those veins would get weaker”. And so on. If she asks about what specific device I have in me, or how it specifically works, then yeah, at that point I would show her.

I guess what I will end up doing is to start with the casual version, and then gradually get more and more technical depending on the questions that will (surely) arise. I think it would be harder to feel misled if she doesn’t ask too many questions herself, so I would rather avoid giving her too much more than she can handle in one sitting.

Sorry for the lengthy message, I just want to cover as many scenarios as possible so I am fully prepared for that conversation..

[duke_cicero]

You are going to be changed, especially as a relatively young, long time sufferer. I’ve been listening to a lot of guys on here over the past year react to their new bionic dicks. As far as I can tell, almost no one is like “eh” and goes on with their lives. Instead, most are like “this is fucking amazing!” and proceed to bang every woman in sight [...]

This has been me, lol. I didn't realize how high my sex drive was until I had an implant...