Gay Male 27, wondering what is like having a MALLEABLE implant

[Italian.98]

Hello everyone!
I’m 27 and developed some degree of ED after taking antidepressants for about a year. I plan to wait another year before deciding whether to get an implant or not, but in the meantime I’d like to gather as much information as possible — just to keep a bit of hope alive.

I’ve been particularly interested in the malleable implant, because the inflatable one seems a bit too mechanical and unnatural to me. I used to have a lot of NSA sex (I was honestly one of the few decent tops in my city before the antidepressants), and I’d really like to get back to that lifestyle. But I just can’t imagine inviting a guy over and then suddenly having to start pumping up my dick in front of him — there’s no way he wouldn’t notice. That’s why I’m curious about the malleable type.

Here are my questions:

1) How discreet is a malleable implant? What are the chances that a guy I hook up with wouldn’t realize it’s artificial? Would he just think, “oh, he got hard just from kissing”? Also, when you have to position it “up,” doesn’t it look obvious that you’re using your hand to make it stand instead of getting hard naturally? How do you guys handle that moment without making it noticeable? Can you do it subtly, like while kissing or undressing

2)How HARD is it, really, on a scale from 1 to 10? My erections used to be around an 8.5 before antidepressants; now, even with meds, I’m about a 6 — which isn’t enough for penetration. Would the implant make me harder than that?

3)What about the glans? How do you guys manage penetration if the head stays somewhat soft? Is that actually a problem, or is it manageable in practice?

My main concern is that, as you probably know, anal penetration requires more rigidity than vaginal sex, so it’s really important to be firm enough.

Honestly guys, I’m just so done with bottoming — I wanna go back to being a TOP again.