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The grandson asks grandpa:
Is that true that when you were young you could hand a 100lbs weight on your erect penis?
Grandpa:
Sure I did. I could still do it, but my knees would give out.


The son is visiting his old man in the hospital and notices that the nurses give each old men a Viagra before bad time. He asks the nurse why.
Nurse:
So they don't roll off the bed at night.

Tom walks into his boss' office and tells him, "Sir, I know things aren't going the best around here but I have three companies that have contacted me recently. I would like a raise." His boss agrees and after debating the amount for a while they agree on a 5 percent raise. When Tom gets up to leave his boss asks him, "What companies contacted you?" Tom smiles and says, "The cable, electric, and water company."