Why am I such an asshole when I get horny?

There is more to sex than an erect penis. How do you maintain your sexuality both for yourself and for your partner? What techniques do you use to give both of you a great, satisfying sex life? How do you explore your own body and sexuality now that the rules have changed?
Lost Sheep
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2016 11:16 pm

Re: Why am I such an asshole when I get horny?

Postby Lost Sheep » Mon Nov 09, 2020 8:53 pm

Old Guy wrote:notaes- Yea I try to handle the lack of sex better now I am older. Just got irritated with promises and no show.

brickbat- Thought with a wife so much younger I would never lack. Damn aging process, but my libido has always been off the charts and I'm closing in on 70.

Update: Well we talked this out. Not gonna say it was easy, and I still know her feelings were hurt badly. I totally believe her when she says she has never cheated on me. We have made up and had a wonderful time this morning.

Don't we all just LOVE a happy ending?

Congratulations.
Lost Sheep
AMS LGX 18+3 Nov 6, 2017
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Old Guy
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Re: Why am I such an asshole when I get horny?

Postby Old Guy » Tue Nov 10, 2020 9:52 am

Lost Sheep wrote:Don't we all just LOVE a happy ending?

Congratulations.


Thanks Lost Sheep.
I know it's still going to take a while for her to heal totally.
Nov. 8, 2019
4+ years, Coloplast Titan OTR
Married 36 years to my beautiful young bride
Always here to answer questions if you PM me

Lost Sheep
Posts: 6131
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2016 11:16 pm

Re: Why am I such an asshole when I get horny?

Postby Lost Sheep » Tue Nov 10, 2020 11:55 am

Old Guy wrote:
Lost Sheep wrote:Don't we all just LOVE a happy ending?

Congratulations.


Thanks Lost Sheep.
I know it's still going to take a while for her to heal totally.

And for your own healing, too.

A wounded woman is one thing in a marriage. A wounded man is another element. A wounded relationship is a third element. It is best to heal all three.

I have posted many, many times, "Women are incredibly supportive if they feel respected, trusted and safe. Not to mention reassured that she is loved. And not just physically. I have heard it said that foreplay begins by doing the dishes for her, and if you want to get between her thighs, start at the feet (foot massage).
Lost Sheep
AMS LGX 18+3 Nov 6, 2017
Prostate Cancer 2023
READ OLD THREADS-ask better questions -better understand answers
Be part of your medical team
Document pre-op size-photos and written records
Pre-op VED therapy helps. Post-op is another matter

Old Guy
Posts: 2459
Joined: Tue Mar 31, 2020 4:31 pm
Location: Ohio

Re: Why am I such an asshole when I get horny?

Postby Old Guy » Wed Nov 11, 2020 2:56 pm

Lost Sheep wrote:And for your own healing, too.

A wounded woman is one thing in a marriage. A wounded man is another element. A wounded relationship is a third element. It is best to heal all three.

I have posted many, many times, "Women are incredibly supportive if they feel respected, trusted and safe. Not to mention reassured that she is loved. And not just physically. I have heard it said that foreplay begins by doing the dishes for her, and if you want to get between her thighs, start at the feet (foot massage).


Yes, thanks.
I try to do as much as I can around the house since I'm retired and home while she still works. I've always treated her special, but my past haunts me. 3 wives who all cheated on me, she is #4. Just a few things that sent me back there happened and I snapped. But my love for her has done nothing but grow after 30+ years and two children. I just feel bad because what I said can never be taken back, and the hurt will always be there for her.
Nov. 8, 2019
4+ years, Coloplast Titan OTR
Married 36 years to my beautiful young bride
Always here to answer questions if you PM me

Lost Sheep
Posts: 6131
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2016 11:16 pm

Re: Why am I such an asshole when I get horny?

Postby Lost Sheep » Fri Nov 13, 2020 12:42 pm

Old Guy wrote:Yes, thanks.
I try to do as much as I can around the house since I'm retired and home while she still works. I've always treated her special, but my past haunts me. 3 wives who all cheated on me, she is #4. Just a few things that sent me back there happened and I snapped. But my love for her has done nothing but grow after 30+ years and two children. I just feel bad because what I said can never be taken back, and the hurt will always be there for her.

Time heals all wounds.

Time wounds all heels. (You are not a heel. Your expressed feelings rule that out, so don't beat yourself up.)

Allow time to heal your wounds, too.

It seems to me that you (both) are on your way in that journey. Painful as it is, as long as it is in the right direction, even the healing of wounds journey can be enjoyable. It is the optimism that is the drug fueling the oxytocin that strengthens the bonds of love.


(edited to add: What am I doing? Channelling Rev. Robert Schuller? (no relation))
Lost Sheep
AMS LGX 18+3 Nov 6, 2017
Prostate Cancer 2023
READ OLD THREADS-ask better questions -better understand answers
Be part of your medical team
Document pre-op size-photos and written records
Pre-op VED therapy helps. Post-op is another matter

oldbeek
Posts: 2441
Joined: Sun Sep 10, 2017 1:46 pm
Location: Los Angeles area

Re: Why am I such an asshole when I get horny?

Postby oldbeek » Sun Nov 22, 2020 5:36 pm

Can I add some humor here? Having sex is a misdamenor. The more I miss the meaner I get.
82, good health, RP 7-2017, all nerves taken , PSA 0.05, 4-18,, .07 1/19,.05 4/19, .03 11-21, .04 11-23, implanted 4-1-18, Infra-pubic, AMS lgx 15 cm with 5cm rte. Implant at USC Keck. Dr Boyd and Dr Loh Doyle 6.5 x 5, 800 AUS 7-21-20


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