About to give up... Don't mind me I just want to vent...

What are your fears? Ideas? Hints? to coping with ED. What helps you with your mental game? How are relationships affected?
EvilUncleEarnie
Posts: 4
Joined: Sun Jul 19, 2015 11:03 pm

About to give up... Don't mind me I just want to vent...

Postby EvilUncleEarnie » Tue Sep 08, 2015 10:00 pm

I have tried the pills, have a fancy electric/manual pump that I cannot get to work, and have seen a urologist who had no suggestions... I was taking testosterone shots but my doctor is worried because my white blood cell count is up and she says that the T might cause that. Plus I recently found my brothers (I was adopted at birth) and found out that prostate cancer runs in the family so that is another reason she wanted to stop the shots. On the bright side, my T level will no doubt drop to low double digits like it has before (it was 33) when I first started the shots and when I quit the T-gel (it dropped down to the low 20's) when I had to find a new doctor who would give me a Testosterone Rx. That means that my sex drive will go away again and I will stop thinking about it all the time.

When I am on Testosterone, I get so aggravated not being able to have sex. It seems like sex is all around me and I am getting nothing since I cannot do anything. I do masturbate by myself even though I don't get hard. I usually do it 3 to 4 times a week. Quite often I will watch/look at porn to do it. It's OK, but it just feels like something is missing. Kind of like wanting a corvette and ending up with a Yugo. You get there but it just isn't the same. Looking at porn is like starving and all you have is a cook book to look at the food pictures.

My wife has pretty much given up sex entirely. We kiss and occasionally snuggle but most of the time she doesn't want me to touch or cuddle her because she says I am to hot and her hot flashes make it worse. And she says she has no interest in sex. I am not sure if she just shut down because I cannot have sex or if it is something else. It sucks because she tells me about when she was younger and had sex all the time with pretty much any male that came along. (I asked her how many once and she said she lost count after about 50, most were when she was 13 to 18). Hearing about all her sex exploits does not help at all.

Not really looking for any cures, I guess I just wanted to vent... LIfe sucks and I have pretty much come to accept that it sucks.

dg_moore
Posts: 1885
Joined: Mon Apr 25, 2011 9:34 am

Re: About to give up... Don't mind me I just want to vent...

Postby dg_moore » Wed Sep 09, 2015 9:11 am

Being without sex is not so bad, especially when your libido is low due to low T or whatever other cause. Like yours, my wife lost interest in sex after menopause and years of fumbling around with ED, and I had a stroke that took away my libido. We have been asexual for over 10 years and our relationship remains healthy and happy, but no longer intimate.
Dave, 80, Maryland - Implant (Titan) 2008 by Dr. Andrew Kramer (failed Sept 2020) - never used due to a stroke that, among other things, ended my sex life.
Life is not the way it's supposed to be, it's the way it is.

6gun 44 mag
Posts: 112
Joined: Sat Dec 17, 2011 11:01 pm

Re: About to give up... Don't mind me I just want to vent...

Postby 6gun 44 mag » Thu Oct 01, 2015 7:15 pm

I can identify with much of your post--not all but some of your points. I have an older wife who still has a nice 36 C top, good figure below that, nice face. But like you, after ED showed up here, she just went into hibernation. She's not angry--but I feel she is horny sometimes and frustrtated like me. Yesterday, I got her in the shower, felt her up good, lathered her, and she began lathering me too. Suddenly, we had better than half a hard. She almost had me going off in the shower it felt so good. We dried off--and it went back to zero, but she still got me off easily with a bit of oral. It showed me that some serious foreplay and a bit of playing and touch and feel can still have a huge affect on me, and I think it gave her some ideas to perhaps try soon in the shower again. If you have neglected touch---feel---intimacy---eyefuls of your womans flesh in the shower---then try it. Next time I will try to take a Cialis in advance and check it out with this renewed effort of intimacy--not just popping a pill and waiting for chemicals to be absorbed. If I'm honest, the last few years of intercourse we had, we spent mainly humping, shooting, and end of story. After this little encounter with her this week---I amost have renewed hope. I'm sure most have tried hard to overcome---but try some hot water---closeness, soap, touch and feel. I sure re-learned a few things.

dg_moore
Posts: 1885
Joined: Mon Apr 25, 2011 9:34 am

Re: About to give up... Don't mind me I just want to vent...

Postby dg_moore » Fri Oct 02, 2015 9:36 am

6gun44mag wrote:...If you have neglected touch---feel---intimacy---eyefuls of your womans flesh in the shower---then try it.
I haven't seen my wife in the shower for over 20 years - she is strictly a private bather and has always dressed in the closet. Even so, our sex life was great until ED came along, but as pills and injections failed it dwindled to nothing. Suggestions to try to get it going again ignore the fact that a stroke took away my desire - I have no more interest in sex than in knitting. But living without sex is fine - our relationship is good and we enjoy each others' company, which is all one really needs. I remain on FrankTalk to discuss everything about implants (other than using one).
Dave, 80, Maryland - Implant (Titan) 2008 by Dr. Andrew Kramer (failed Sept 2020) - never used due to a stroke that, among other things, ended my sex life.
Life is not the way it's supposed to be, it's the way it is.

6gun 44 mag
Posts: 112
Joined: Sat Dec 17, 2011 11:01 pm

Re: About to give up... Don't mind me I just want to vent...

Postby 6gun 44 mag » Sat Oct 03, 2015 6:46 pm

I want to believe that most men on Franktalk---have a lot more interest in sex than knitting. My suggstions were for men who might could use them, as I have had yet another experience in the shower that was very amazing to me after so long a dry spell. Maybe someday I too would buy some yarn and needles--but right now I'm back on the trail.

Anonymous2
Posts: 625
Joined: Thu Sep 22, 2011 2:44 pm

Re: About to give up... Don't mind me I just want to vent...

Postby Anonymous2 » Mon Nov 30, 2015 3:09 pm

Hi EVE sure your not Wicked Uncle Earnie That's what happens when your a Who fan, So EVE life sucks, your right there life without sex does suck.

If you have never seen any of my posts I'm a great believer in the herbal way of life, just googel DRUS VERSUS HERBS, HERBS MY CHOICE, and your see how I got over mine, I found out by doing a lot of research that its our blood, get that working for you and your most of the way there, a couple of things I take do raise your testosterone ones a hormone called DHEA and a herb called Tribulus, these two work down the same road, so one helps the other, as long as your not on any drugs for heart, HBP, cholesterol. antidepression or anxiety then just give it a trail.

Things like Cayenne pepper, Turmeric and garlic are great for cleaning your blood the other supplements will help boost it, and DHEA your wife can even take, it works for both men and women, just google DHEA for women your see, but give this list to your wife these are all natural help for women who have gone through or going through the menopause, and she can googel each for the menopause, there Black cohosh, Evening Primrose oil, Flaxseed, natural progesterone, Omega 3, Vitamin E and Dong Quai these are all said to help, may be get all sexed up again.

I don't really know about other guys on here, but for me a cuddle is the thing you have after sex as for knitting its something the wife does now and again when any new grandchild but mostly great ones these days is on its way.

Look any problems just PM me.

Good Luck

NOWHARD
Your Penis is Affected by Every Aspect of Your Physical, Mental and Emotional Life.


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