ED and a new woman . . . ? Sheesh

What are your fears? Ideas? Hints? to coping with ED. What helps you with your mental game? How are relationships affected?
Andy425
Posts: 443
Joined: Fri Jan 11, 2013 7:52 am

ED and a new woman . . . ? Sheesh

Postby Andy425 » Tue Feb 19, 2013 11:19 pm

Ok guys, I've got a problem and I welcome any opinions or comments.

Per my sig, I had PC surgery 8 months ago at age 61, and am still pretty much impotent. Unfortunately my mind still works like it did when I was a teenager. I started using a VED and taking Cialis right after New Year's, and it has helped some although I still could not penetrate much more than a bowl of oatmeal. I have a routine appt. with my uro coming up on March 15.

Having cancer pretty much devastated me emotionally. Pre-op all I could think about was dying of cancer. Post-op I was incontinent for 3-4 months and could think of nothing else. The fact that I had cancer was almost forgotten. Sex hardly crossed my mind, and when it did it wasn't really serious. The pissing problem has gradually gotten under control (for the most part) and I had pretty much given up on the idea of sex or of any female involvement. Two failed marriages and countless relationships left me pretty cynical about the whole idea. These thoughts actually started around '08, long before the PC diagnosis, when the last serious relationship I had went on the rocks. The last few months I've been pretty content, for once in my life, about the whole idea of not being involved with a woman -- although I don't care for the emotional loneliness.

Now comes the dicey part. I am self-employed and my main customer is a few miles away. They employ around 45 people and I am in and out of the place, depending on what's going on; I may be there several times a week, I may not go there at all for weeks. So there's this woman who works there (haha, you knew that was coming, didn't you?) that is smoking hot. I'm a sucker for perfect asses and she has one. Not to mention long, dark, curly hair -- another one of my weak spots. I really just met her a couple of weeks ago, and we've only been smiling and saying "hi" to each other in the past week or so.

She was joking around with me today and I am 95% sure she wants to get laid. And so, the obvious problem. There are a few guys there (including the owner) who know I had PC. I have no idea if she knows. I have asked a couple of the guys that work there more about her, and I have little doubt that my inquiries have gotten back to her. So she knows I'm interested -- as her behavior today seems to suggest.

What to do? I can feel myself being drawn to ask her out. I can't really stop myself; it's typical of me -- no real will power at all when it comes to alluring women. If that happens, at what point do I tell her how useless I am? Heh, I know that nobody can really answer that, but give me your thoughts anyway.

I'm curious about the prick shots. I'm thinking of asking my uro about it when I go in next month. I've read some of your posts here by users and they seem to be the best option for me right now. Agree? But another part of me says to not bother with this woman (although that would be extremely difficult to do as it stands now) because it could be nothing more than a fling, and considering my condition, it is not worth disrupting my fairly contented life. This would all be different if I was in a committed relationship -- as those of you who are would probably agree.

Damn it.
RP in 2012 because of prostate cancer. 100% ED, also some leakage problems.

JimStars
Posts: 825
Joined: Sun Jan 24, 2010 2:41 pm

Re: ED and a new woman . . . ? Sheesh

Postby JimStars » Wed Feb 20, 2013 12:00 am

Andy,

One thing you have going for you .. is Time. Time to try out your Trimix shots in the next couple months and see how that works for you.

I suppose you could even just do some gentlemenly dating with your gal to be for a while?

Keep working on it ....

J
RP 2008 ... MUSE 2008-9 .. TriMix Gel 2009 .. Trimix 2009-2015 ... PGE-1 2016-2019 ..Misoprostal 2019 Onward. All worked.

Peckerwood
Posts: 218
Joined: Tue Aug 23, 2011 10:48 am
Location: Woodypecker41@gmail.com

Re: ED and a new woman . . . ? Sheesh

Postby Peckerwood » Wed Feb 20, 2013 8:19 am

Call your urologist's office and find out if you can speed up your appointment date. Don't hesitate to ask him to prescribe Trimix. The shots don't hurt, and the results should be fantastic. If you don't have a compounding pharmacy in your hometown, there are some online that you can contact, and most provide next day Fed Ex shipping with the Trimix on ice. Research those pharmacies before your appointment so that you will be prepared. If you need a pharmacy name, you can contact me or check out the posts under injections to find pharmacies that do compounding and shipping. See Ohohiakane's "injection sequence" to see just how it's done, even though your urologist may inject you in his office the first time. This is not something you want to delay, as it's too important to your leading a full life.

John

Andy425
Posts: 443
Joined: Fri Jan 11, 2013 7:52 am

Re: ED and a new woman . . . ? Sheesh

Postby Andy425 » Wed Feb 20, 2013 9:45 am

JimStars wrote:Andy,

One thing you have going for you .. is Time. Time to try out your Trimix shots in the next couple months and see how that works for you.

I suppose you could even just do some gentlemenly dating with your gal to be for a while?

Keep working on it ....

J

Yes, I've actually been holding back just a little bit in order to buy more time. She knows that I may not be in for a week or more at a time, so that's a good thing considering my situation.
RP in 2012 because of prostate cancer. 100% ED, also some leakage problems.

Andy425
Posts: 443
Joined: Fri Jan 11, 2013 7:52 am

Re: ED and a new woman . . . ? Sheesh

Postby Andy425 » Wed Feb 20, 2013 9:48 am

Peckerwood wrote:Call your urologist's office and find out if you can speed up your appointment date. Don't hesitate to ask him to prescribe Trimix. The shots don't hurt, and the results should be fantastic. If you don't have a compounding pharmacy in your hometown, there are some online that you can contact, and most provide next day Fed Ex shipping with the Trimix on ice. Research those pharmacies before your appointment so that you will be prepared. If you need a pharmacy name, you can contact me or check out the posts under injections to find pharmacies that do compounding and shipping. See Ohohiakane's "injection sequence" to see just how it's done, even though your urologist may inject you in his office the first time. This is not something you want to delay, as it's too important to your leading a full life.

John

My uro is always booked up in advance so I can't go in early.

So you can't just buy this ready-made at any pharmacy?

Also, what about MUSE, the pill you inject in your pee-hole? Any good?
RP in 2012 because of prostate cancer. 100% ED, also some leakage problems.

antelope
Posts: 1497
Joined: Sun Nov 14, 2010 3:17 am
Location: Baton Rouge

Re: ED and a new woman . . . ? Sheesh

Postby antelope » Wed Feb 20, 2013 11:38 am

Just a few thoughts:

The benefits--both psychological and physiological--of regular orgasms are important to overall health of every male.

Not having erections is not good for the health of your penile tissue. All muscles need exercise or they wither away.

You don't need to be in a relationship to enjoy an erection or an orgasm. As a matter of fact, you don't even need to be in the same room with someone.

I'm a big believer in injections. I'm a bigger believer in finding the solution that works for you--maybe it's pills in your case. In any case, there is the right solution. Going straight to injections is just taking a short cut.

At some point, I think you will want to tell your new friend that you're recovering from prostate cancer. It shouldn't be any different than a conversation about any other medical malady.

If you decide you want to have sex with this woman, then your ability to do so is not that far off. Take your time, impress her by being a gentleman. Besides, making her wait is not a bad stragegy. :)

Best wishes. Keep us posted.

Greg
Born 1948, wed 1969. BPH & Type II Diabetes at age 35. TURP-2002; ED even before that--diabetes. Cardiac valve surgery: 2007 & 2019. Poor results with pills. Started trimix injections in Nov, 2010. Great results from the very beginning.

trimix60
Posts: 268
Joined: Fri Oct 28, 2011 12:49 pm

Re: ED and a new woman . . . ? Sheesh

Postby trimix60 » Wed Feb 20, 2013 2:03 pm

Hi Andy- Been down that road with my new girl......get on trimix as soon as you can...find another Uro if you have to...!!!!

Trimix has great benefits for your mind and your dick.....it will get you going down the right path mentally and physically.

Good luck....keep us informed on how you are doing...

Cheers,

Curt

Andy425
Posts: 443
Joined: Fri Jan 11, 2013 7:52 am

Re: ED and a new woman . . . ? Sheesh

Postby Andy425 » Wed Feb 20, 2013 3:49 pm

Greg, my responses in red:

antelope wrote:Just a few thoughts:

The benefits--both psychological and physiological--of regular orgasms are important to overall health of every male.

Not having erections is not good for the health of your penile tissue. All muscles need exercise or they wither away. Yes, my uro told me that some months ago.

You don't need to be in a relationship to enjoy an erection or an orgasm. As a matter of fact, you don't even need to be in the same room with someone. Haha, I was giving myself orgasms within a few weeks after surgery, with no erection of course. It's different, but not that difficult to do, and I've been doing it 2-3 times a week since then. With daily Cialis I do get a bit of a "reaction" which helps mentally maybe more than anything.

I'm a big believer in injections. I'm a bigger believer in finding the solution that works for you--maybe it's pills in your case. Well no, as I stated in my original post, pills aren't doing all that much for me. At present doses anyway. In any case, there is the right solution.

Going straight to injections is just taking a short cut. Quoting my original post: "I started using a VED and taking Cialis right after New Year's, and it has helped some although I still could not penetrate much more than a bowl of oatmeal." I don't understand your comment about going "straight to injections." :?:

At some point, I think you will want to tell your new friend that you're recovering from prostate cancer. It shouldn't be any different than a conversation about any other medical malady. Yes, I've been going over that in my mind. The big question for me is when do I tell her? But as I said originally, I realize that that is a question that nobody can really answer. It will just have to be "played by ear" as the situation develops.

If you decide you want to have sex with this woman (I decided I wanted to have sex with her the first time I laid eyes on her, lol) then your ability to do so is not that far off. Take your time, impress her by being a gentleman. Besides, making her wait is not a bad stragegy. :)

Best wishes. Keep us posted.

Ha, yes, I know exactly how to be "the perfect gentleman." I have never "rushed" any woman, and they always react positively to that.

I will keep the board up-to-date. I will probably not see her again at least until next Monday.

Thanks for your comments.
:D

RP in 2012 because of prostate cancer. 100% ED, also some leakage problems.

Andy425
Posts: 443
Joined: Fri Jan 11, 2013 7:52 am

Re: ED and a new woman . . . ? Sheesh

Postby Andy425 » Wed Feb 20, 2013 3:53 pm

trimix60 wrote:Hi Andy- Been down that road with my new girl......get on trimix as soon as you can...find another Uro if you have to...!!!!

Trimix has great benefits for your mind and your dick.....it will get you going down the right path mentally and physically.

Good luck....keep us informed on how you are doing...

Cheers,

Curt

Thanks for the support, Curt. :mrgreen:

A question, if you don't mind: Did you have ED before you met her?
RP in 2012 because of prostate cancer. 100% ED, also some leakage problems.

trimix60
Posts: 268
Joined: Fri Oct 28, 2011 12:49 pm

Re: ED and a new woman . . . ? Sheesh

Postby trimix60 » Wed Feb 20, 2013 4:25 pm

Hi Andy- Yes, I had ED before we started our relashionship.....

A little history....I had my RP...my wife divorced me...I started dating and was able to have sex with one lady using my trimix....first time for that....and it was great !!! was able to keep going until she was all worn out !!!! :-)

I was desperate to have sex with someone....I needed to know for myself that I could deal with this problem and I did...it all worked out great.

I then meet my fiance' through a freind of mine and flew to the Philippines to be with her and get to know her....we had sex the first night...I had told her about my cancer and RP, but not about my ED or the trimix.

We were just getting ready to go at it and I told her I had a little secret that would give me wood for a couple of hours.... :o Before she could even think about it....I gave myself the shot and jumped into bed. We played around for a bit and I became hard as a rock....wow !!! she said :shock: ....this is really nice and after she had a couple of orgasms and I could keep going....she said..."can we have a 5 min break please" The first round with her lasted almost 90 minutes..it was great !!!

I am heading down there again tomorrow to spend 2 weeks with her.....for me, trimix has been great....I could never have this kind of fun without it..

Cheers,

Curt


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