ScrewedbyDoctors wrote:I never went for an opinion for an implant, I'm just guessing. But I don't think is safe to have an implant in my case, I just have to accept my tragic event and don't have sex again
Something shitty clearly happened to you. Let's stipulate that. Something apparently very shitty. Ok. And that sucks and because it's your dick it's extra horrifying to those of us who also value our dicks. Absolutely. And I (we
- because this place is full of guys who have empathy galore) feel terribly for you. All of this is true.
And now, blunt ass truth time:You have got to drop your fucking story and do...something.
Just about anything. Different.
Two things can be true at the same time - bad shit happened AND you need to take control and materially do something to improve what's next. To one degree or another, I just broadly described nearly every guy on FT. (And, every person outside of FT who values clear mental health and minimal regret in their life).Do. Something.
This is an active
endeavor which doesn't mean wallow in your story and hope you can someday time travel back to the day before that clinic did whatever they did.
By "do something" I don't mean re-blend all the crappy things you've experienced into some entirely new stew of despair. Not that. Ok? That's effortless. That's the easiest thing you'll ever do. And to some extent, at some point, we can all be guilty of marinating in the past. I'm seriously advising you to assemble whatever strength you can cobble together and just dial the phone and find the best men's sexual health urologist you can find who is close to you. Or not
close to you. Just find them and get yourself in their office pronto. That's how you begin to transcend victimhood.
You are "just guessing" about the future health of your dick??
Um...that is not good policy, man. It is not. That's passive, and that's discomfort and fear talking.
And in this place here, with the # of dudes who have gone through untold oceans of their own shit in all their lives, too, you are going to find a very, very warm reception and conversation anytime you wish, and support and advice galore. You will. But less so, I think, if you limit your self-improvement routine to "guessing" and grinding yourself into dust recounting past wrongs committed against you.
I'll also suggest, as others have started to allude to here, that you might greatly benefit from turning the mirror on yourself for just a wee moment in the course of putting this shit behind you. Again, let's stipulate that the clinic somehow fucked up. Ok, they fucked up. But you...you
...have culpability here, too. You do. You had (and have) the opportunity to be an assertive, active participant, and in fact star quarterback of your own healthcare and well-being. And I don't know that this has occurred to you. But it's true. And it's actually necessary (assuming you truly aspire to a functioning dick and a meaningful future sex life).
I gather that you may not care much for the tough love coming your way here. That's ok, too. You have a choice in all this. Lots of choices. You can shrug this type of advice off and stay in Fucked-Up-Dickland, or you can drive yourself forward to something better. It's demonstrably that goddam simple, man. Stay. Or go.
What, you may ask, does "something better" look like?
Dial that phone until you're overwhelmed and excitedly exhausted by all the new options you find. Do that. That's the first step in finding out. Brew the goddam coffee and inhale gallons of it staying up odd hours reading and researching and getting yourself better informed around next steps, take notes, write out questions, call more, email more, and set the appointment. But if you can't or won't be assertive and get moving like that, I think you'll find a mostly chilly reception here if you limit yourself to the re-telling of past wrongs.
So either feel roughed up by the tough love here, or feel newly motivated to change. Right? That door is locked from the inside and the good (and bad) news is - you alone have the power to grab your rudder and steer yourself. Either differently, or along the same worn course.
This might be further presumptuous but what the hell. I recommend you dig in and do some reading and really raw self-reflection on your underlying approaches to the not great things in life. The ways in which you personally appreciate and metabolize and prioritize the not-so-great stuff. There are other ways to approach the rotten stuff, and I can definitely make a reading list recommendation or two. Message me if you like. Or don't. Freedom of choice and all.
Sincerely wishing you the strength and motivation to carve your new path.
54 yrs. Blessed with highly sexual 52 yr old wife. Pills 10 years, then 9 yrs Trimix. 28 cm Titan Touch XL 2019, Laurence Levine, Rush Univ Med Ctr, Chicago. Implant = nonstop fun. Hypogonadal, so also 10+ years testosterone replacement.