Stressful conversation with girlfriend

What are your fears? Ideas? Hints? to coping with ED. What helps you with your mental game? How are relationships affected?
User avatar
bldoink
Posts: 3715
Joined: Mon Apr 03, 2017 12:58 am
Location: Fl.

Re: Stressful conversation with girlfriend

Postby bldoink » Wed Mar 30, 2022 1:08 pm

The link the spontaneous one posted seems to be broken. I think this is where he was trying to point you:

https://www.reachmedical.com/blue-ultimate-round-rings-with-gentle-flex-technology/ I have no experience with that brand of ring or that supplier. Of course they have pumps and other brands of rings on that site.

If your doctor tells you not to do something either don't do it or get a second professional opinion.

My non-medical, non-professional opinion would be that, if used correctly so as to NOT over pump or exceed the recommended time limit for wearing the tight medical grade rings, neither the ring or pumping should cause damage and will likely improve penis health. Of course always follow your doctors recommendations.
R.R.P 2011 Mayo Jacksonville, Dr. M. Wehle. Nerve sparing - damaged. C in margin. Radiation 2023, V.E.D, Viagra and PGE-1 (80mcg/ml) injections @ ~ 14 units. Originally Edex20, then compounded PGE-1 - cost. Inject. 12 yrs. It works. Treasure coast of FL.

alfa88
Posts: 373
Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2018 2:59 pm
Location: North of Gilligan's Island

Re: Stressful conversation with girlfriend

Postby alfa88 » Wed Mar 30, 2022 2:04 pm

My 2 cents worth. Have you tried Viagra, brand name or generic? If you're a 1st timer the doc may give you a sample pack. There's also a multitude of other types.
As far as rings go. If one doesn't work try 2. Pump the willy up, slip on ring, pump up again and slip on a 2nd ring and again pump up.
BTW you could also take the pills and use a pump at the same time.
A third penny(bonus advice) How about giving her oral while you both work this through.
53 years old, married 32 years. Decades of ED & PE. BPH. Tried Viagra W & W/O T-Shots, Levitra and Cialis, Edex, Trimix starter, medium, strong with poor results, VED. Implanted w/AMS700CX 21cm X 12mm w/1.5cm RTE by Dr. Leroy Jones 9/1/20

Alan810
Posts: 135
Joined: Wed Jun 02, 2021 1:38 pm
Location: South Florida
Contact:

Re: Stressful conversation with girlfriend

Postby Alan810 » Wed Mar 30, 2022 2:48 pm

Spontaneous1 wrote:Baseballfan, if you can afford a cheap $20 pump and then get a multi-set of constriction bands (usually 3 or more different sizes) to use until you figure out what's going on, I think you'll find you can at least have sex in the meantime. A properly sized vacuum pump will allow you to pump up till you're erect, and then you can "load" the band (slide the flexible band off the vacuum cylinder onto your penis, without breaking the seal, to maintain your erection). This can take a little practice, and use some lube prior to pumping up, but once you find the correct band tension it should maintain your erection for PIV sex. When you get to this point DO NOT leave it on longer than 30 minutes! There are a few types of bands (not cock rings) you can try, do some searching on this site, the Osborn ones seem to be popular and the ones below that I've had success with. There are ways around what's happening to you, don't lose hope, good luck. https://www.reachmedical.com/blue-ultim ... echnology/


I also had problems finding the correct ring or rings - something that worked. MY VED would product an erection, but the sex shop and most of the other rings did not support keeping it. I finally had success with the Osbon ErecAid rings. They are tight and designed to apply pressure to the valves to eliminate valve leakage. I was able to use them at first with a cheap sex shop pump but had to really work to stretch them on to the tube, because of how tight they were. Since they worked so well, I invested in the Erecaid Classic VED. No problem since. I was concerned about removing those tight (2) rings, but that was a non issue. Plenty of lube and pulling on the handles to let the blood flow out and they''re off. Also use plenty of lube on yourself when pumping. Keep the faith...you'll get there!
https://www.vitalitymedical.com/timm-os ... bands.html
85 yrs old. Married 42 yrs. On meds for B/P, Cholesterol and BPH. Greenlight procedure yrs ago. 30 yrs ED w/Retrograde Ejaculations. Tried Pills, Injections & different pumps. Excellent results with ErecAId pump & Beige D & Gray D rings.

Spontaneous1
Posts: 317
Joined: Fri Apr 09, 2021 10:14 am
Location: Central Pa.

Re: Stressful conversation with girlfriend

Postby Spontaneous1 » Wed Mar 30, 2022 3:17 pm

Baseballfan, what Alan810 said. Plenty of people on here use constriction bands, so unless your doctor specifically said not to use them I believe they would work for you. It's all a matter of finding the one(s) that helps maintain your erection without being too tight.
Retired 65 y.o. Married. Moderate ED since 2019. Use constriction band ocassionately to help maintain erection, or Cialis/Viagra. Nocturnal/morning erections returning with VED usage. Lower libido than before.

Baseballfan11
Posts: 216
Joined: Thu Mar 29, 2018 3:13 am

Re: Stressful conversation with girlfriend

Postby Baseballfan11 » Thu Mar 31, 2022 3:07 pm

alfa88 wrote:My 2 cents worth. Have you tried Viagra, brand name or generic? If you're a 1st timer the doc may give you a sample pack. There's also a multitude of other types.
As far as rings go. If one doesn't work try 2. Pump the willy up, slip on ring, pump up again and slip on a 2nd ring and again pump up.
BTW you could also take the pills and use a pump at the same time.
A third penny(bonus advice) How about giving her oral while you both work this through.


Appreciate you alfa. I don’t know which VED/pump would work best or which is safest. Also, the ones I’ve seen at sex stores are all around $200. I will need to do some research then about how to proceed with that, but I am willing to give it a try to maintain some circulation. I tried sample packs of daily cialis as well as viagra from a urologist a few years ago. I went to a few appointments and didn’t find results from the drugs.
26 years old. USA. ED problem since teenage years. Doctor prescribed ED meds showing some efficacy but not a guarantee. As much as I’d like the implant I now think I should hold off if I’m seeing some results from pills

Baseballfan11
Posts: 216
Joined: Thu Mar 29, 2018 3:13 am

Re: Stressful conversation with girlfriend

Postby Baseballfan11 » Thu Mar 31, 2022 3:07 pm

Alan810 wrote:
Spontaneous1 wrote:Baseballfan, if you can afford a cheap $20 pump and then get a multi-set of constriction bands (usually 3 or more different sizes) to use until you figure out what's going on, I think you'll find you can at least have sex in the meantime. A properly sized vacuum pump will allow you to pump up till you're erect, and then you can "load" the band (slide the flexible band off the vacuum cylinder onto your penis, without breaking the seal, to maintain your erection). This can take a little practice, and use some lube prior to pumping up, but once you find the correct band tension it should maintain your erection for PIV sex. When you get to this point DO NOT leave it on longer than 30 minutes! There are a few types of bands (not cock rings) you can try, do some searching on this site, the Osborn ones seem to be popular and the ones below that I've had success with. There are ways around what's happening to you, don't lose hope, good luck. https://www.reachmedical.com/blue-ultim ... echnology/


I also had problems finding the correct ring or rings - something that worked. MY VED would product an erection, but the sex shop and most of the other rings did not support keeping it. I finally had success with the Osbon ErecAid rings. They are tight and designed to apply pressure to the valves to eliminate valve leakage. I was able to use them at first with a cheap sex shop pump but had to really work to stretch them on to the tube, because of how tight they were. Since they worked so well, I invested in the Erecaid Classic VED. No problem since. I was concerned about removing those tight (2) rings, but that was a non issue. Plenty of lube and pulling on the handles to let the blood flow out and they''re off. Also use plenty of lube on yourself when pumping. Keep the faith...you'll get there!
https://www.vitalitymedical.com/timm-os ... bands.html


Thanks, Alan! I’ll look into that specific VED you mentioned. There’s no issue you’ve had in discoloration or injury from that device cutting off new blood flow?
26 years old. USA. ED problem since teenage years. Doctor prescribed ED meds showing some efficacy but not a guarantee. As much as I’d like the implant I now think I should hold off if I’m seeing some results from pills

Frank Talk Admin
Site Admin
Posts: 656
Joined: Mon May 18, 2009 11:06 am
Location: NYC

Re: Stressful conversation with girlfriend

Postby Frank Talk Admin » Mon Apr 04, 2022 9:42 am

Hi,
I just had to drop in an give you my two cents. Until you get a medical exam with hormone levels, there is no way to know what is going on. Considering the stressful life you are leading...and the stressed out tone of your posts...This could also be anxiety - which is a medical condition in itself. You also may have a pelvic floor disorder.
How are your erections for masturbation? do they come and go? are they ever good? If so, when was the last time they were good?

What happens if you just play with your girlfriend and decide to not have intercourse?

Have you tried the pills yet? You can get generics for as little as 50 cents now from compounding pharmacies in your town.
Do you have any student health insurance?
Paul

Baseballfan11
Posts: 216
Joined: Thu Mar 29, 2018 3:13 am

Re: Stressful conversation with girlfriend

Postby Baseballfan11 » Mon Apr 04, 2022 11:54 am

Frank Talk Admin wrote:Hi,
I just had to drop in an give you my two cents. Until you get a medical exam with hormone levels, there is no way to know what is going on. Considering the stressful life you are leading...and the stressed out tone of your posts...This could also be anxiety - which is a medical condition in itself. You also may have a pelvic floor disorder.
How are your erections for masturbation? do they come and go? are they ever good? If so, when was the last time they were good?

What happens if you just play with your girlfriend and decide to not have intercourse?

Have you tried the pills yet? You can get generics for as little as 50 cents now from compounding pharmacies in your town.
Do you have any student health insurance?
Paul


Thanks, Paul, for your post. I have considered the anxiety aspect. I agree that it certainly can’t help and I’ll be the first to admit that I have an obsessive mind. I masturbated incorrectly right when I was going through puberty which I have shame about because I think that messed up my body. I would squeeze my penis between my thighs because that sensation felt pleasurable. I could not succeed in doing it the “normal” way. At this initial time I would get erect immediately from any sort of sexual image or mental scenario. Over time I think it’s natural that anyone’s mind gets a bit desensitized. I have considered that over many years of masturbation, fantasizing, masturbating incorrectly until I was around 18 I have done considerable damage. I don’t remember having a piercing, hard as wood, throbbing erection since I was very very young before I discovered this improper way to masturbate, which worked better when I wasn’t fully hard. Unless I wake up really having to piss, nothing even close to morning wood. It depends with my girlfriend and that’s where I’ll concede the desensitized thing. If I haven’t seen her in awhile I at least have some minimal function to where I can insert it into her for a few minutes until it looks sort of swollen but not hard, to where I can’t do it any longer. There are times where we’ll do sexual things and nothing happens, not even one millimeter of movement. I tried daily Cialis from a sample pack a urologist gave me a few years ago and not really any help. I do have health insurance but being 24 I believe I’m still on my parents plan. Hope this helps your interpretation. I would hope I’m not exaggerating my condition out of fear. Ive had so many failures in sexual opportunities, and weak erections on my own that I highly doubt it’s just anxiety
26 years old. USA. ED problem since teenage years. Doctor prescribed ED meds showing some efficacy but not a guarantee. As much as I’d like the implant I now think I should hold off if I’m seeing some results from pills

Martin6469
Posts: 496
Joined: Tue Feb 18, 2020 12:22 pm
Location: St. Louis, USA

Re: Stressful conversation with girlfriend

Postby Martin6469 » Thu Apr 07, 2022 10:12 pm

Maybe it's low testosterone. Get a free measurement from the campus health clinic - simple blood draw.
Age 78 in 2023. On testosterone replacement due to hypothalamus malfunction. (Attention depressed guys: low testosterone is a cause.) Healthy health nut but ED due to getting old. Like to keep enough cardiovascular ability to thrust for 30 min.

Baseballfan11
Posts: 216
Joined: Thu Mar 29, 2018 3:13 am

Re: Stressful conversation with girlfriend

Postby Baseballfan11 » Sun Apr 10, 2022 10:25 am

Martin6469 wrote:Maybe it's low testosterone. Get a free measurement from the campus health clinic - simple blood draw.


Thanks Martin. I thought maybe that as well. Doctors said I was lower but in the low normal range. They gave me Clomid to try for awhile but this didn’t really help much
26 years old. USA. ED problem since teenage years. Doctor prescribed ED meds showing some efficacy but not a guarantee. As much as I’d like the implant I now think I should hold off if I’m seeing some results from pills


Return to “Emotional and Mental Support”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 15 guests