Wife told daughter about my Ed...

What are your fears? Ideas? Hints? to coping with ED. What helps you with your mental game? How are relationships affected?
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Joined: Sun Apr 30, 2017 5:00 am

Re: Wife told daughter about my Ed...

Postby Hunchback » Mon May 31, 2021 3:21 am

jeffrey79 wrote:Hello all. I've been struggling with Ed for some years now and after fumbling upon this forum I have a little hope now.

But very recently I found out that my wife of 16 years old her 26 year old daughter of my difficulties in frustration. She says that she didn't say much but I doubt that very seriously as the daughter has a mouth like a wide open faucet and I know that they've had full conversations about my Ed. I also know for a fact that the daughter has told some outside non-family members and my issues could spread it the street like covid. I just can't imagine being around a group of people and the joke is on me. There ain't no telling how long this has been going on. This has left me feeling betrayed, humiliated and many other ways that I haven't felt before. This has all but crushed any little confidence that I had about myself and I'm really torn and hurt by this. This is new territory for me and I'm beginning to seek help for my Ed but mentally I'm trashed and I know see them both differently.

What do you guys and ladies (if any) think about this? Am I overacting and how would this make you feel if you were in my shoes. I really need help with this because it's tearing me down.

That's pretty sad to hear. The emotional aspect of ED can be extremely heavy, as all here know. It's a weight on the shoulders of not only the man with ED but of their partner as well - It's not easy for anyone. However, the unrelenting, complete and genuine support of the partner is paramount to dealing with this. Abusing the trust of someone and sharing personal details without their consent is really, really bad.
Still, i don't want to judge your wife. I don't know either of you and it's not my place to push to decisions.

What i can tell you tho, that might help you, is that what's done is done. I fully understand not wanting to talk about ED with people, i know i haven't talked about it with anyone but my parents and wife... but what you should keep in mind is that WAY more men suffer from the same thing than you probably imagine. Don't fear that "the joke's on gonna be on you". End of the day, ED is a medical condition, it is NOT your fault and not something to really be ashamed of. It's not for everyone to know, since it doesn't concern them, but it's no different from any other condition that we might have and don't automatically talk about.
If anything, you can be proud of having the strength to deal this problem, rather than feeling ashamed.
37 years old, married. ED all my life because of spinal cord injury caused by a tumor in early infant age. Using standard EDEX20 for ~ 16 years.

Posts: 116
Joined: Wed Dec 30, 2015 5:50 pm
Location: Fla. / Ky.

Re: Wife told daughter about my Ed...

Postby beachbum » Mon Jun 21, 2021 2:14 pm

Just read a few of the comments on this. I think I agree and disagree. Yes it was probably, and most likely, wrong of her. But before I could say for sure I would like to know what brought up the subject. Was the daughter asking mom for advice because of her boyfriend, husband, or what ever. Or did the wife just start telling about your problems? Without knowing that it would be hard to fully condem her. Note I said fully. I don't know your situation and all, but I think I would use this as a motivation to solve the ED problems. I would be be seeing my Dr asap and see what he says. And if not satisfied with the answer, find another Dr. As you know from being here on FT, there are many ways to help. If you've tried the other methods, pills, ved, shots, and none have been successful, then go for the implant if you can swing it. I know that any success will help you mentally and emotionally. I know from my own experience the important did wonder for me mentally.
As for the wife, some here say leave her. If you still care for her ,that would be the wrong thing. Others say tell something on her. Again might not be a good idea, . That could escalate into a tell all about any and every thing. Confronting her about it could go either way. She could see how much it hurt and not do something like that again, or not care and tell about that. You will have to decide. If it didn't bother her about how you felt, then you may want and need to reevaluate you marriage.
My best piece of advice is to do anything and everything you can to fix the ED. And do it for yourself.
67. ED for about 10+ years to one extent or another. Implanted 9/14/2016 AMS CX 18+3 Fl/ Ky

Lost Sheep
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2016 11:16 pm

Re: Wife told daughter about my Ed...

Postby Lost Sheep » Tue Jun 22, 2021 2:54 pm

I wish the original poster (jeffrey79) would come back and give us an update on how he and his family are getting on. He has only posted once.
Lost Sheep
AMS LGX 18+3 Nov 6, 2017 Dr Shaw.
READ OLD THREADS to ask better questions and better understand answers.
Make yourself part of your medical team.
Document your current penile size: photos and written records.
Pre-op V.E.D. therapy helps.

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