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My fiance won't me

Posted: Wed Sep 12, 2018 6:34 pm
by Josef007
As a sad news of today , i was talking to her very happy & said to myself "this is the woman that will fight with me what i'm going through."
Then we both approached to talk about our futur as i though , then a man with abilities & older than me appears to make from me look worthless & she assured hé will be her husband & she feels sorry for me .
Yea , sorry for me , fuck it , tired from playing games why you was so sweet before he appears ?
Why you was ignoring somehow and act weirdly in normal days?
What should i do ? It's a damn situation , my reproductive system needs support in 2 fields .
Yep , i'm a risky situation then & this pisses me off.

Re: My fiance won't me

Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2019 12:51 pm
by DaveKell
Scrolling through some old posts and came across this. It had no replies. I’m compelled to give you an example from my past. At age 25 I had been in a 6 month long relationship with a stunningly beautiful woman. She had a 9 year old son from a first marriage. I met her in one of my classes while attending Indiana University. I had gotten very close with her son as well. I was very deeply in love with this woman, all the way to the very core of my being. My uncle told her I was very serious about her. She informed me she never intended to have more kids. I didn’t care, she was my whole world. She began not answering my phone calls and a few times not coming to the door when I knew she was home. I was seemingly tossed to the curb with no explanation. She lived a few blocks from where I worked. Driving by her house a number of times I saw a new white Vette in her drive. I began frantically calling over and over until she finally answered the phone. She told me the Vette belonged to a young surgeon doing a residency in a local hospital. A friend fixed her up on a date with him. She said she had her son’s future to consider and a surgeon trumped a student! I was completely devastated. It was the first time in my life I cried over a woman until I vomited. My life fell apart. I quit my job the next day and quit attending class. I realized I was hopelessly suicidal. I tossed my clothes in my car and abandoned everything I had in a rent house and moved 60 miles away to my mother’s house. My existence was over in my mind. I couldn’t stop thinking about her. A few months went by and I ran into a cousin of hers in town who I had met when she came to visit once. She recognized me and asked how Rhonda and I were doing. I dissolved into a sobbing mush and left very quickly. A few weeks after that I saw her again. She had contacted Rhonda’s sister and learned the young surgeon was only after a local sex score and had dumped Rhonda already. Also that Rhonda was despondent over me moving away. I considered calling her to try and get back together. I was blind to the affair she had with the surgeon. Something kept me from doing that. I eventually met a girl 7 years younger than me who had 2 years to go getting her teaching degree. 3 months later we were married. I’ve been blessed with 3 phenomenal kids who are all educated professionals and married to the same. I have grandchildren from all of them. My life is infinitely more rewarding than it would’ve been with Rhonda. My point is I learned heartbreak is very survivable and you can do better. I have no idea if you’ll see this reply but I’m hoping your circumstances have improved.

Re: My fiance won't me

Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2019 1:55 pm
by stubby
Awesome story !

Re: My fiance won't me

Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2019 2:01 pm
by Larry10625
DaveKell wrote:Scrolling through some old posts and came across this. It had no replies. I’m compelled to give you an example from my past. At age 25 I had been in a 6 month long relationship with a stunningly beautiful woman. She had a 9 year old son from a first marriage. I met her in one of my classes while attending Indiana University. I had gotten very close with her son as well. I was very deeply in love with this woman, all the way to the very core of my being. My uncle told her I was very serious about her. She informed me she never intended to have more kids. I didn’t care, she was my whole world. She began not answering my phone calls and a few times not coming to the door when I knew she was home. I was seemingly tossed to the curb with no explanation. She lived a few blocks from where I worked. Driving by her house a number of times I saw a new white Vette in her drive. I began frantically calling over and over until she finally answered the phone. She told me the Vette belonged to a young surgeon doing a residency in a local hospital. A friend fixed her up on a date with him. She said she had her son’s future to consider and a surgeon trumped a student! I was completely devastated. It was the first time in my life I cried over a woman until I vomited. My life fell apart. I quit my job the next day and quit attending class. I realized I was hopelessly suicidal. I tossed my clothes in my car and abandoned everything I had in a rent house and moved 60 miles away to my mother’s house. My existence was over in my mind. I couldn’t stop thinking about her. A few months went by and I ran into a cousin of hers in town who I had met when she came to visit once. She recognized me and asked how Rhonda and I were doing. I dissolved into a sobbing mush and left very quickly. A few weeks after that I saw her again. She had contacted Rhonda’s sister and learned the young surgeon was only after a local sex score and had dumped Rhonda already. Also that Rhonda was despondent over me moving away. I considered calling her to try and get back together. I was blind to the affair she had with the surgeon. Something kept me from doing that. I eventually met a girl 7 years younger than me who had 2 years to go getting her teaching degree. 3 months later we were married. I’ve been blessed with 3 phenomenal kids who are all educated professionals and married to the same. I have grandchildren from all of them. My life is infinitely more rewarding than it would’ve been with Rhonda. My point is I learned heartbreak is very survivable and you can do better. I have no idea if you’ll see this reply but I’m hoping your circumstances have improved.



Oh how I love happy endings. I must say though, I was hoping you would say something about how nasty you ex's life turned out cause she freakin deserves it. :)

Larry

Re: My fiance won't me

Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2019 2:59 pm
by DaveKell
Larry10625 wrote:
DaveKell wrote:Scrolling through some old posts and came across this. It had no replies. I’m compelled to give you an example from my past. At age 25 I had been in a 6 month long relationship with a stunningly beautiful woman. She had a 9 year old son from a first marriage. I met her in one of my classes while attending Indiana University. I had gotten very close with her son as well. I was very deeply in love with this woman, all the way to the very core of my being. My uncle told her I was very serious about her. She informed me she never intended to have more kids. I didn’t care, she was my whole world. She began not answering my phone calls and a few times not coming to the door when I knew she was home. I was seemingly tossed to the curb with no explanation. She lived a few blocks from where I worked. Driving by her house a number of times I saw a new white Vette in her drive. I began frantically calling over and over until she finally answered the phone. She told me the Vette belonged to a young surgeon doing a residency in a local hospital. A friend fixed her up on a date with him. She said she had her son’s future to consider and a surgeon trumped a student! I was completely devastated. It was the first time in my life I cried over a woman until I vomited. My life fell apart. I quit my job the next day and quit attending class. I realized I was hopelessly suicidal. I tossed my clothes in my car and abandoned everything I had in a rent house and moved 60 miles away to my mother’s house. My existence was over in my mind. I couldn’t stop thinking about her. A few months went by and I ran into a cousin of hers in town who I had met when she came to visit once. She recognized me and asked how Rhonda and I were doing. I dissolved into a sobbing mush and left very quickly. A few weeks after that I saw her again. She had contacted Rhonda’s sister and learned the young surgeon was only after a local sex score and had dumped Rhonda already. Also that Rhonda was despondent over me moving away. I considered calling her to try and get back together. I was blind to the affair she had with the surgeon. Something kept me from doing that. I eventually met a girl 7 years younger than me who had 2 years to go getting her teaching degree. 3 months later we were married. I’ve been blessed with 3 phenomenal kids who are all educated professionals and married to the same. I have grandchildren from all of them. My life is infinitely more rewarding than it would’ve been with Rhonda. My point is I learned heartbreak is very survivable and you can do better. I have no idea if you’ll see this reply but I’m hoping your circumstances have improved.



Oh how I love happy endings. I must say though, I was hoping you would say something about how nasty you ex's life turned out cause she freakin deserves it. :)

Larry


After I had been married for about 3 years I was in my office one morning at my sign company. The phone rang, this was before caller ID. A female voice said "Hi Dave, do you recognize my voice?". Of course I did and I have to admit my heart began racing. It was Rhonda. She had heard from my uncle she ran into in a bar that I owned a sign company in Texas where we moved after my wife graduated college. He told her what town so I guess she just hoped to get lucky by calling information for KellSigns in Fort Worth. We had some idle chit chat during which she told me how much she regretted leaving me for the up and coming surgeon. She blamed it on her parents who she said were pressuring her to hang onto the doctor. She probably didn't know I already had the story of the doc dumping her after racking up his local score on a residency in a new town. I told her how great my life was and how with half the year gone my self employment income was already over a hundred grand (in 1980's money). She told me she was still single and that her old VW Karmann Ghia was on its last leg. As I recall, my brother stopped by the shop and I ended the call. I'm sure I spent a good part of the rest of the day remembering how incredibly beautiful she was, especially naked on top of me. In all fairness, she really didn't anything over my wife in that regard. Fast forward 30 years and lo and behold I get a Facebook friend request from her. I accepted it but told my wife who she was right away. I told my wife I only friended her to eventually have the opportunity to thank her for enriching my life so immensely by dumping me.

I have no idea how her life turned out but was amused that she made 2 comments about how the years had been good to me. She was finally married. I checked out her photos and saw that her husband could play Santa every year without a fat suit. Also, that her son was bald and the size of a sumo wrestler. The best part was seeing how the years had not been kind to her. Those once perfect boobs were now soccer balls around her ankles and to quote Jim Croce's song Roller Derby Queen, "she was built like a 'frigerator with a head". Weirdly though that stunningly beautiful face was still the same. I figure if I ever win the lottery I'll buy her a restored Karmann Ghia as a Thank You for causing me to have the most blessed heart break ever. She put me through the wringer for a fact. It was my first and only experience with love gone horribly wrong but the experience was something I was able to draw on in later years counseling a son and a few friends who were in the same position I was once was. I absolutely shudder to contemplate if I had been so stupid as to move back to the town where she was and take up with her again. I definitely won all the way around.

Re: My fiance won't me

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2019 6:34 am
by Larry10625
DaveKell wrote:
Larry10625 wrote:
DaveKell wrote:Scrolling through some old posts and came across this. It had no replies. I’m compelled to give you an example from my past. At age 25 I had been in a 6 month long relationship with a stunningly beautiful woman. She had a 9 year old son from a first marriage. I met her in one of my classes while attending Indiana University. I had gotten very close with her son as well. I was very deeply in love with this woman, all the way to the very core of my being. My uncle told her I was very serious about her. She informed me she never intended to have more kids. I didn’t care, she was my whole world. She began not answering my phone calls and a few times not coming to the door when I knew she was home. I was seemingly tossed to the curb with no explanation. She lived a few blocks from where I worked. Driving by her house a number of times I saw a new white Vette in her drive. I began frantically calling over and over until she finally answered the phone. She told me the Vette belonged to a young surgeon doing a residency in a local hospital. A friend fixed her up on a date with him. She said she had her son’s future to consider and a surgeon trumped a student! I was completely devastated. It was the first time in my life I cried over a woman until I vomited. My life fell apart. I quit my job the next day and quit attending class. I realized I was hopelessly suicidal. I tossed my clothes in my car and abandoned everything I had in a rent house and moved 60 miles away to my mother’s house. My existence was over in my mind. I couldn’t stop thinking about her. A few months went by and I ran into a cousin of hers in town who I had met when she came to visit once. She recognized me and asked how Rhonda and I were doing. I dissolved into a sobbing mush and left very quickly. A few weeks after that I saw her again. She had contacted Rhonda’s sister and learned the young surgeon was only after a local sex score and had dumped Rhonda already. Also that Rhonda was despondent over me moving away. I considered calling her to try and get back together. I was blind to the affair she had with the surgeon. Something kept me from doing that. I eventually met a girl 7 years younger than me who had 2 years to go getting her teaching degree. 3 months later we were married. I’ve been blessed with 3 phenomenal kids who are all educated professionals and married to the same. I have grandchildren from all of them. My life is infinitely more rewarding than it would’ve been with Rhonda. My point is I learned heartbreak is very survivable and you can do better. I have no idea if you’ll see this reply but I’m hoping your circumstances have improved.



Oh how I love happy endings. I must say though, I was hoping you would say something about how nasty you ex's life turned out cause she freakin deserves it. :)

Larry


After I had been married for about 3 years I was in my office one morning at my sign company. The phone rang, this was before caller ID. A female voice said "Hi Dave, do you recognize my voice?". Of course I did and I have to admit my heart began racing. It was Rhonda. She had heard from my uncle she ran into in a bar that I owned a sign company in Texas where we moved after my wife graduated college. He told her what town so I guess she just hoped to get lucky by calling information for KellSigns in Fort Worth. We had some idle chit chat during which she told me how much she regretted leaving me for the up and coming surgeon. She blamed it on her parents who she said were pressuring her to hang onto the doctor. She probably didn't know I already had the story of the doc dumping her after racking up his local score on a residency in a new town. I told her how great my life was and how with half the year gone my self employment income was already over a hundred grand (in 1980's money). She told me she was still single and that her old VW Karmann Ghia was on its last leg. As I recall, my brother stopped by the shop and I ended the call. I'm sure I spent a good part of the rest of the day remembering how incredibly beautiful she was, especially naked on top of me. In all fairness, she really didn't anything over my wife in that regard. Fast forward 30 years and lo and behold I get a Facebook friend request from her. I accepted it but told my wife who she was right away. I told my wife I only friended her to eventually have the opportunity to thank her for enriching my life so immensely by dumping me.

I have no idea how her life turned out but was amused that she made 2 comments about how the years had been good to me. She was finally married. I checked out her photos and saw that her husband could play Santa every year without a fat suit. Also, that her son was bald and the size of a sumo wrestler. The best part was seeing how the years had not been kind to her. Those once perfect boobs were now soccer balls around her ankles and to quote Jim Croce's song Roller Derby Queen, "she was built like a 'frigerator with a head". Weirdly though that stunningly beautiful face was still the same. I figure if I ever win the lottery I'll buy her a restored Karmann Ghia as a Thank You for causing me to have the most blessed heart break ever. She put me through the wringer for a fact. It was my first and only experience with love gone horribly wrong but the experience was something I was able to draw on in later years counseling a son and a few friends who were in the same position I was once was. I absolutely shudder to contemplate if I had been so stupid as to move back to the town where she was and take up with her again. I definitely won all the way around.



Well Dave, that's a great story... I was rooting for you all the way through it. It pisses me off A LOT when I hear that women dump guys for money, better looking, bigger dicks, etc, and I always hope that they get what the deserve in the end, I don't even know Rhonda and I don't like her. Thanks for sharing, that story just made my day. :)

Larry

Re: My fiance won't me

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2019 1:52 pm
by Lost Sheep
In Rhonda's defense: She may have indeed gotten got she deserved and suffers commensurate with her callousness she inflicted in her younger years. But we do not know her story, why she did what she did and how she evolved into the (unhappy?) person she is now.

Condemn her and rejoice in her comeuppance if you must. Put pity her as well.

Had she stayed in the relationship she terminated so cavalierly, she may have become a beautiful person inside as well as outside. Who can tell?

To forgive (or at least let insults go) edifies oneself more than it benefits the offender.

Re: My fiance won't me

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2019 2:39 pm
by DaveKell
Lost Sheep wrote:In Rhonda's defense: She may have indeed gotten got she deserved and suffers commensurate with her callousness she inflicted in her younger years. But we do not know her story, why she did what she did and how she evolved into the (unhappy?) person she is now.

Condemn her and rejoice in her comeuppance if you must. Put pity her as well.

Had she stayed in the relationship she terminated so cavalierly, she may have become a beautiful person inside as well as outside. Who can tell?

To forgive (or at least let insults go) edifies oneself more than it benefits the offender.


I thoroughly agree, but it just feels SOOO GOOOOD to see how her assessment of hooking up with the surgeon instead of the student fizzled on her. I knew her parents and definitely believe they were all over her to hang onto the doctor and send me down the road. The fact is that right up until she suddenly shut me out she acted like a woman who was as in love with me as I was with her. I have viewed it like this for decades now, I traded in a daughter of satan for a heavenly angel residing on earth. I dodged a big bullet there by never ending up married to her. This whole thing reminds me of some advice I got years ago from a coworker. He said you're best off not to marry a woman who has been divorced. His reasoning was that she already has experience in dealing with a failed marriage, knows it's survivable, and is equipped to go through it again. I've watched his advice play out over the years in the lives of many people including two in my immediate family, siblings of mine. It's like a once divorced person is one third incapable of having a second marriage last. Twice divorced is two thirds. Anything more than that is a total crap shoot.

Re: My fiance won't me

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2019 4:52 pm
by Larry10625
DaveKell wrote:
Lost Sheep wrote:In Rhonda's defense: She may have indeed gotten got she deserved and suffers commensurate with her callousness she inflicted in her younger years. But we do not know her story, why she did what she did and how she evolved into the (unhappy?) person she is now.

Condemn her and rejoice in her comeuppance if you must. Put pity her as well.

Had she stayed in the relationship she terminated so cavalierly, she may have become a beautiful person inside as well as outside. Who can tell?

To forgive (or at least let insults go) edifies oneself more than it benefits the offender.


I thoroughly agree, but it just feels SOOO GOOOOD to see how her assessment of hooking up with the surgeon instead of the student fizzled on her. I knew her parents and definitely believe they were all over her to hang onto the doctor and send me down the road. The fact is that right up until she suddenly shut me out she acted like a woman who was as in love with me as I was with her. I have viewed it like this for decades now, I traded in a daughter of satan for a heavenly angel residing on earth. I dodged a big bullet there by never ending up married to her. This whole thing reminds me of some advice I got years ago from a coworker. He said you're best off not to marry a woman who has been divorced. His reasoning was that she already has experience in dealing with a failed marriage, knows it's survivable, and is equipped to go through it again. I've watched his advice play out over the years in the lives of many people including two in my immediate family, siblings of mine. It's like a once divorced person is one third incapable of having a second marriage last. Twice divorced is two thirds. Anything more than that is a total crap shoot.



yeah, I'm just a mean pr$%k sometimes. :)

Larry

Re: My fiance won't me

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2019 5:33 pm
by Lost Sheep
DaveKell wrote:
Lost Sheep wrote:In Rhonda's defense: She may have indeed gotten got she deserved and suffers commensurate with her callousness she inflicted in her younger years. But we do not know her story, why she did what she did and how she evolved into the (unhappy?) person she is now.

Condemn her and rejoice in her comeuppance if you must. Put pity her as well.

Had she stayed in the relationship she terminated so cavalierly, she may have become a beautiful person inside as well as outside. Who can tell?

To forgive (or at least let insults go) edifies oneself more than it benefits the offender.


I thoroughly agree, but it just feels SOOO GOOOOD to see how her assessment of hooking up with the surgeon instead of the student fizzled on her. I knew her parents and definitely believe they were all over her to hang onto the doctor and send me down the road. The fact is that right up until she suddenly shut me out she acted like a woman who was as in love with me as I was with her. I have viewed it like this for decades now, I traded in a daughter of satan for a heavenly angel residing on earth. I dodged a big bullet there by never ending up married to her. This whole thing reminds me of some advice I got years ago from a coworker. He said you're best off not to marry a woman who has been divorced. His reasoning was that she already has experience in dealing with a failed marriage, knows it's survivable, and is equipped to go through it again. I've watched his advice play out over the years in the lives of many people including two in my immediate family, siblings of mine. It's like a once divorced person is one third incapable of having a second marriage last. Twice divorced is two thirds. Anything more than that is a total crap shoot.

Yes, I dodged a similar bullet myself. I always wonder if I had married her she would have come out happier (and me happier for it as well). But I know in my head AND in my heart that the likelihood of that being true is slim to none. Unlike you, I have kept up acquaintance with my "daughter of Satan" over the years. I am friends with her current husband and I feel sorrow for his fate and thankful I am not him.

But I try not to hold a grudge. "To err is human; to forgive, divine." To which I add, "To survive one's error, a blessing."