I had a breakdown yesterday.

What are your fears? Ideas? Hints? to coping with ED. What helps you with your mental game? How are relationships affected?
cwatt1
Posts: 134
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Location: Illinois
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Re: I had a breakdown yesterday.

Postby cwatt1 » Wed Apr 20, 2022 9:40 pm

This is such a valuable discussion, and it sttengthens my resolve to take the next step and get an implant.

I have had ED issues for a number of years, ever since I was on an anti-depressant. SSRi''s are notorious for causing your libido to tank, andcaused me m ED besides. My libido is not what it was before that, but it has come back some. I can get hard, but can't stay that way long enough to penetrate, regardless of whether I use injections, VED, or pills. This has created a psychological issue as well as a physical one.

I am hoping that once I get an implant and am able to penetrate again, that psychological block will gradually disappear. Even if I can't cum right away (and I do have that problem), it's going to be so great to be able to stay hard and continue the sex act for as long as we both want to! I think, and hope, that in turn will enable to me to have restored confidence and even be able to cum more easily.
ED since using SSRI antidepressants. Unable to maintain erection sufficient for penetration. Tried PDE5's, VED, injections. AMS 700 CX implanted 8/1/2022, penoscrotal by Dr. McVary, Loyola medical center. 15cm + 1.5 and 1.0 RTE's. 65 ml reservoir.

ScrewedbyDoctors
Posts: 195
Joined: Fri Dec 31, 2021 7:59 pm

Re: I had a breakdown yesterday.

Postby ScrewedbyDoctors » Mon May 02, 2022 3:59 pm

At least your penis is not deformed like mine, good luck with the implant
I had a trauma 2 years ago, caused me narrowing, dent and shortening. PRP injections three months ago=worse narrowing, and worse ED. Now I only have two choices: impotent or implant. Born in 1975, in a relationship with girlfriend fir 4 years

Nadie123
Posts: 124
Joined: Tue May 26, 2020 10:20 pm

Re: I had a breakdown yesterday.

Postby Nadie123 » Thu May 19, 2022 10:29 pm

Baseballfan11 wrote:
Halfman wrote:I can FULLY relate. FULLY.
Not only do i - i speak for myself - have to put up with the inability of fulfilling an istinctive need human's existence is meant to be based upon. As it werent't enough, i even have to look around every fucking day of my fucking life and see guys of my age, in their mid 20's, fucking and getting girls satisfied and flabbergasted simply by resorting to the most natural and granted thing a man could possibly have: a functioning dick. The same thing i didn't get after losing the genetic lottery.
Nothing can make up for such humiliation, for the whole of devastating experiences i went through and for the awareness of being doomed to live and die as a miserable half man.
That's it, at least for me.
I'm gonna get implanted too, but, in my specific case, the psychological, social, relational existential full-blown devastation i've been experiencing is irreversible.
What's broken, is broken.
I hope you'll benefit from surgery better than i do.
Good luck.


You wrote my exact story. Would love to chat more with you guys if you want. I consider myself a very social, relatively decent looking 24 year old. Living with 3 guys in undergrad who constantly had girls home was a living nightmare. Forget the physical pleasure I’m sure they had. The mental agony I had was unreal and shameful, so I never told them

How its going bro.. Im anoche dude with ED.. yes and young i would wont to talk with you just for talking with other guy in this fuking hell.... i am santiago from Colombia where are u
25 -year-old Colombian ... Psychological ED for life, I use viagra spontaneously with ex cellent results, it stopped working and developed a leak ... cialis + viagra work halfway in one position hate mi life but I am struggling to get an implant

Injustright
Posts: 104
Joined: Thu Jun 02, 2022 3:14 pm

Re: I had a breakdown yesterday.

Postby Injustright » Fri Jun 10, 2022 1:58 pm

Things that will never, ever happen to me.

I don't have anything profound to add but it seemed like for once in my life I could vent all of my frustrations and sadness and despair in one place.

I feel lucky that in my twenties and thirties I was fairly normal in terms of sexual responsiveness. Even so I always envied friends who seemed to be doing so much better with the opposite sex because they were more attractive or better endowed and therefore more confident. I even envied friends of mine that were bi or gay because I know they could strut around with erections that wouldn't fail for long periods.

But shortly after turning forty things went south. Antidepressants helped cause the problem but shortly thereafter ED set in regardless of medications and then I was diagnosed with low testosterone. Then my wife decided she no longer wanted sex of any kind and I had to struggle with whether or not it was worth staying in the relationship. For several reasons I decided to, but that's a decision that I sometimes wonder about. But just because you can't perform and your spouse doesn't want it doesn't mean you don't have the desire. When you start to total up what you've lost it can be pretty devastating. To go a couple of decades without anybody wanting to provide pleasure for you and you having somebody to direct your attentions to just causes despair.

When I reached the point of allowing myself out of desperation to try the swinger lifestyle I could go to a swing party, but I had to time the Viagra or Cialis just right so that the five minutes it would work three or four hours after taking it were just when I needed to be able to perform. One particular female I crossed paths with five separate times and not once could I get a hard on to play with. For you men in your twenties perhaps you should never turn down any opportunity because you don't know when it would be your last. (Gee, I'm sooo glad I spend all those weekend nights studying instead of dating, telling myself there would be time for fun later...)

I sometimes wonder if the ability to see lots of people having fun in amateur porn makes the problem worse, but I'll always know there are people who are enjoying themselves regardless of whether or not they're filming it. I feel cheated and resentful and almost ashamed and certainly not like a full man. I know that that shouldn't be how you measure your masculinity but it's hard to console yourself with other things that you can do when you would just like to be able to masturbate successfully! I've learned how to tell myself that there are other things that make me who I am but on a lonely Saturday night when you're by yourself and your spouse doesn't care about your physical side and you have given yourself permission to play with friends with benefits, and then you fail to perform with that desired friend with benefits I can't tell you the number of times I've sunk into depression.

All our situations are unique and having somebody say "be glad for what you have" does not give you back what you are missing or have been denied. A paraplegic doesn't get any function back because there are quadriplegics, and a person in his twenties with ED doesn't make a person in his fifties feel any better.

So—here I am. Eighteen months ago I saw a urologist hoping to get some answers only to have him discover a neurogenic bladder condition. Fully a year later after catheterizing myself daily to address that I found a different urologist who insisted on actually addressing the main the problem. If I'm very lucky I might be able to get an implant at the end of this year, two years after seeking specialized help, when I can take time off from work. In the meantime, to paraphrase Pink Floyd, “Hanging on in quiet desperation is the” impotent man’s way...
Decades+ ED; finally ultrasound showed venous leak+arterial insufficiency. Infrapubic (Yay!) implant by Dr. Karpman 8/9/22; with 13 cm distal, 9 proximal Titan. Cleared for new life 9/1/22 and hoping to make up for lost time.

oldbeek
Posts: 2454
Joined: Sun Sep 10, 2017 1:46 pm
Location: Los Angeles area

Re: I had a breakdown yesterday.

Postby oldbeek » Thu Jul 14, 2022 7:09 pm

JimBeam wrote:I'm older than you are, I'm 69, but severe ED has also caused me to have depression and I broke-down 6 months ago over it. A VED has not solved my problem either - it's an Encore and is a total flop.
My doctor has mentioned a penile implant and it's my next step to having an active sex life.
Hope you have success and can get back to a sex life you enjoy.

Jim, Medicare pays for the implant. Get on with it. Makes you a new man.
82, good health, RP 7-2017, all nerves taken , PSA 0.05, 4-18,, .07 1/19,.05 4/19, .03 11-21, .04 11-23, implanted 4-1-18, Infra-pubic, AMS lgx 15 cm with 5cm rte. Implant at USC Keck. Dr Boyd and Dr Loh Doyle 6.5 x 5, 800 AUS 7-21-20

Johann1953
Posts: 12
Joined: Mon Jul 25, 2022 1:52 am

Re: I had a breakdown yesterday.

Postby Johann1953 » Sat Jul 30, 2022 8:56 am

I would like to enchourage and guymwhou is contemplating on getting the implant to go ahead and get it done. I am 3 months post op and am already starting to feel things beginnig to happen down there. I am busy tanking Testosterone medication tho get my system to work again. But how nice it is to have sex as long as you like it with no pressure to perform.

Johann1953
Posts: 12
Joined: Mon Jul 25, 2022 1:52 am

Re: I had a breakdown yesterday.

Postby Johann1953 » Sat Jul 30, 2022 8:57 am

I would like to enchourage and any guy is contemplating on getting the implant to go ahead and get it done. I am 3 months post op and am already starting to feel things beginnig to happen down there. I am busy tanking Testosterone medication tho get my system to work again. But how nice it is to have sex as long as you like it with no pressure to perform.

JimBeam
Posts: 8
Joined: Wed Dec 09, 2020 5:28 pm
Location: NE Oklahoma, USA

Re: I had a breakdown yesterday.

Postby JimBeam » Fri Aug 12, 2022 4:02 pm

I had my doctor's appointment in Tulsa and I will be having penile implant surgery the 1st week in October. My mind was made-up to move forward and get it done, and my Urologist told me he had no more to offer as an aid for my ED except an implant. Pills for 15+ years and a vacuum erection device, in the last 6 months, haven't worked satisfactorily. It was my preference to wait until October, so this oppressive Oklahoma heat will be gone, and the mowing season would be nearly over. Dr. Pritchard in Tulsa, OK will be my surgeon. His track record is excellent, so I feel confident it'll work-out fine.

Lost Sheep
Posts: 6133
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2016 11:16 pm

Re: I had a breakdown yesterday.

Postby Lost Sheep » Fri Aug 12, 2022 4:51 pm

Johann1953 wrote:I would like to enchourage and any guy is contemplating on getting the implant to go ahead and get it done. I am 3 months post op and am already starting to feel things beginnig to happen down there. I am busy tanking Testosterone medication tho get my system to work again. But how nice it is to have sex as long as you like it with no pressure to perform.

I am compelled to point out that "pressure to perform" is still there (for me). The uncertainty if my penis will perform is no longer an issue, but I still feel obliged to perform (that is make my lover's experience all that it can be) to my maximum ability. It is a point of pride, if nothing else.

Big difference is that it is a joyous pressure.
Lost Sheep
AMS LGX 18+3 Nov 6, 2017
Prostate Cancer 2023
READ OLD THREADS-ask better questions -better understand answers
Be part of your medical team
Document pre-op size-photos and written records
Pre-op VED therapy helps. Post-op is another matter

Definedfitness
Posts: 13
Joined: Sat Apr 09, 2022 9:42 am

Re: I had a breakdown yesterday.

Postby Definedfitness » Wed Aug 17, 2022 9:28 am

EVERYONE HERE!

I had my bladder and prostate removed! That means no sex for you ! Trimex hammers it home.. Please follow directions! I didnt and it cost me about 3" of length and huge amounts in width. But the first time it hit. I felt 18 again. was amazing. Follow directions. so you can have a long ( hard ) life of sex!

Message me for info, if y
needed! I'm 50.. Lost everything to me at 48.. I pushed the limit on everything ! i Know the results


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