My Journal

[merrix]

Day 13 post op

Had a decent night. Best so far, but still too painful to get a good sleep all through the night. Stayed off the painkillers, but pain was still better then any previous night. Got up at 2 am and took a bath. Total pain relief.

Morning was ok. The good trend continues, but I still get bad (pulsating) pain when standing up, and have mild pain when lying down.
Had an appointment with Dr. Eid at 11 am. Last time I saw him was 6 days ago.
The walk to his office, 200 m, was by far the least painful one so far. Just 'normal' bearable pain. Not the one that completely absorbs you and just makes you want to... Yes what? Not much you can do...

A nurse removed the sutures (stitches) and then Eid came in to the exam room and went straight at it. Began deflating me. Squeezing the pump only gave pain from skin being pinched, but the squeezing of the penis hurted more. He deflated me completely in a few painful seconds.
And said: "This is good. There is no infection. Deflate valve is very easily accesible."
He immediately went on to inflating. A few forceful squeezes and my dick stood tall. He kept pumping and then the pain set in in the penis. Quite bad, but I've definitely experienced worse during the last two weeks...
He just laughed and stopped.
"OK, now you deflate" he said. "I'll be back soon" he said and left.
I pressed the deflate valve, which again hurt pretty bad in the skin, squeezed the penis and managed with help of a second attempt deflate pretty well.
Eid came back and felt the penis and said it was deflated.

He said I am still quite swollen, much more than normal, but that he is confident pain and swelling is not from an infection. It is from the extensive diluting causing "crazy bleeding" and the rather long surgery with three different implant setups tested. This then caused swelling and inflammation.

"Good" I said. I was pretty worried for a while.
"Me too" he answered.

He said I am all clear now. Pain is only limit. I can go home tomorrow.
I must start cycling at least once per day starting now.
I can have sex whenever I want, it is only about the pain. He expects it to take a while though. So do I...

I asked him about my result. Did he achieve under average, average, or above average with me.
He just smiled and said "you've got a weapon. You saw how your penis points straight up like a teenager's erection. It's gonna hit all the right spots. I'm a bit worried about your wife. Have you warned her?"

He said the reason my erection points straight up is mostly because, as I mentioned before, the internal part of my penis was longer than normally for my age. This gives the needed force or leverage to point it straight up. Normally in my age the angle with an implant would be around 3 o'clock he said. And even though it'd be rock hard, it'd tend to swivle or wobble compared to a healthy natural erection. He was pretty confident ther would be no wobbling in my case.

This made my day obviously. My pain is still quite bad and I just want to lie flat down in bed. But the pain all of a sudden got easier to bear with. I just see the final result so much clearer now. I am all of a sudden quite confident I will have a good outcome and that gives me more strength to manage the pain. I feel there is still a long time to go to be pain free, and a long way to go to restore any kind of normal life. Work feels distant. But I'll take that.

Still considering whether I'll go home tomorrow or stay a few more days.
It still hurts to stand and walk and the trip will be rough.
Furthermore we have guests coming and staying two nights over New Year's, and I will need some pretty bad lies to explain why I am such a shitty host and just lying in the sofa all day... I will feel rude and maybe I'll skip going home. Will decide tonight.

[larrys1]

That is all great news merrix! Love the part about him saying you've got a weapon. That's what we all want right? Hopefully your pain just continues to get better and better and you will be able to try it out on the wife soon. Make her eyes pop open! Heck you're already in New York. Might as well stay for New Years celebration!

[alibaba]

Fabulous news and envious of your 2:00 position. Seeing videos that all pointed at 3 concerned me. To me that was not natural compared to the days when I had working parts. Cheers to you, heal well! d

[merrix]

Thanks guys.

I am happy about my 2 o'clock erection.
Less happy right now about my 3 o'clock flaccid. Totally deflated.
However, since Dr. Eid has been right about every word he has said so far, I guess I'll have to trust him when he says it'll go down with time.
He has however said that with his 100% aggressive sizing of cylinders, aimed at perfecting the erection, my flaccid may not be the most pefect outcome... The 21 cm + RTE would have given a more down pointing flaccid but a more swively and wobbly erection. Pros and cons with all choices...
As long as it goes down to the region of 4:30-5:00 it'll be ok.

To you veterans out there with Titans: where are your flaccids hanging at? What time so to say..? (Using the clock analogy).

[merrix]

Update 10 pm, Day 13 post op

Just started my cycling. Inflated for 25 minutes. Not much pain at all. I would 't even call it pain. Just feeling the penis stretching a bit. Very mild pain from skin being squeezed when pressing the pump. Pump not too hard. Used two hands, one to pump and one to hold pump in place. I needed 30-40 gentle squeezes to get (very) hard. Maybe there was room for more, don't know, but this was hard beyond any normal erection I'd say.
Deflating was not painful either. Same there, mild pain from the skin being squeezed between fingers and pump. Needed two hands, but this was my first attempt. I slipped once with one hand and nearly crushed one of the natives in there, so used one hand to keep pump in place and one to press the deflate valve. Some mild pain from squeezing the penis to completely empty cylinders. But noway near the pain I've been feeling recently.
Also, both inflating and deflating was a breeze compared to first time about 11 hrs ago in Eid's office.

And of course, not having had an orgasm for 15-20 days and lying there with the absolutely hardest erection of my life, I just couldn't help using it for something. Took some lotion and masturbated very gently. Basically just massaging the glans. It took me 10 minutes till orgasm and ejaculation.
Weird but great feeling to masturbate with a dick which doesn't go soft without jerking and pulling it like crazy.
Can't wait to try it in a match situation...

I tried to measure it as well. Girth 13.5 cm vs 14 cm pre op. Looks thicker though, but that's probably because I see it from above and it is wider but probably thinner from above to below.
Length is really difficult to compare. My erection used to point up at maybe 2:30. And I could easily press it to 3 o'clock when standing up to measure it in the 3 o'clock position. Pre op I was 15.5-16.5 cm depending on erection quality. 16.5 when pills worked well and with an aroused and engorged glans.
Now however, my erection is somewhere at 1:00-1:30 and No way I can bend it down to 3:00. Or at least I didn't even want to push it and try. Measuring it when it points at 1:15 is a different story. I got it to 14, but it'd measure longer for sure if pressed down to 3:00.
Will see what happens with time after weeks or months of cycling.
Honestly, should it stay between 14 and 15 with maintained girth - I am totally fine with that. That'd give me average length and above average girth with way beyond average hardness and durability. Fine for me.

[alibaba]

Stunning that you have made so much progress! I would tend to think you probably have a little swelling yet and when things settle down a little then you will hang better. Do not know if you have the Titan which I suspect since Eid seems to favor it, but they are known not to hang quite as low and loose as an AMS/Boston.
Dr's scheduling secretary called today and left a message to call. Hoping they are calling to move up the date. 56 days to go as of now. Said they would call if they had any cancellations.
Double envious now. 2:00 and hard. those days were good memories and I am sure yours will be too! d

[MARKOS2018]

At the start of your post it seemed you were going to give us bad news however as Eid gave you confidence you managed to do spectacularly! Everything that you hoped for and as time goes, you'll see it gets easier. His leaving the room gave you time to build your confidence.

He is skilled and has an excellent approach. His personality assured me that he would do everything right for me--as he did for you.

He told me the Titan would give me the girth that I lost before the surgery. I point generally at 3 but at times fully aroused it pints like at 2. Wish you a good flight home...and painless.

Rod

[Xomanow]

Glad to hear that you've progressed to this point and the worst is behind you....All the best for your return home and "hard" times ahead......

[merrix]

Day 14 post op

Pumped again this morning. Third time. Basically no pain. Pumping very easy, can do with one hand. Deflating a bit more tricky. Need two hands.

Bad news is I'm not flying to Europe tonight.
Problem is rather social than medical. We will have several guests staying over for several days in New Year. A whole family and the boyfriend of my elder daughter.
I am still in too much pain to be a host. All I want to do is just lay back in the sofa and do nothing. There is no lie in the world I can use to be credible. I'll be caught either as a liar or the crappiest host of all times. I don't like the idea of either. Our guests fly in from another european country. The don't have snow, and the whole idea was for us to enjoy winter. Long walks, staying outside with the kids etc. i just can't do that, pain is too bad.
Easier to make up a story about needing to stay in SE Asia for work issues.

So I'll be stuck in this hotel room another 8 nights when i fly back to SE Asia and meet up with my family there after their Scandinavia holidays is over.

Crap, but that's how it is going to be.

Met Eid again today. He's very pleased with my progress in terms of cycling. Cycling to full inflation without pain at day 13 is ahead of the normal protocol.
But my swelling and inflammation is way behind. I just need to give it time.
Which I all of a sudden have now. More than I wished for.

[RelievedofED1]

Sorry to hear about the delay in travel but understand. Great to hear how quickly you have progressed to pumping.