90% there

The final frontier. Deciding when, if and how.
defiant
Posts: 525
Joined: Mon Apr 25, 2016 9:35 am

90% there

Postby defiant » Thu Jun 21, 2018 8:54 am

Guys, I’m on the cusp of opting to get this done and attempt to put all of the stress, the worrying, the fear of failure, the self-loathing and deep upset behind me for a shot at a more sustained and confident future, one that will allow me to truly move forward in life without this issue creeping into every single facet of my life.

But of course, being someone who (according to doctors) suffers only from mental blocks as opposed to physical ones makes this a truly tough call. And yes, I’ve tried it all now, psychologists, two of them, a shrink, an anti anxiety medication with no sex sides, meditation, even a hypnotist, all at great cost to my wallet with no tangible benefit. At all.

I want to try at least one more time with another woman, the ‘natural’ way, with pills (which have always worked but my levels of anxiety and depression being what they are now I’m not sure they will again). But it’s all just so disheartening and disappointing and this has been going on over a decade now and the only thing that has remained constant is the gradual decline in mental state, anxiety and thus, ability.

I’m calling upon anyone who has two cents to share, to please lend an opinion, share with me your experiences with the implant, try to imagine yourself in my shoes, relatively young and single but with such devastating history with this problem. Mental or physical, it’s still a very very real problem and to me, it’s one body, body and mind. And mine is malfunctioning.

Thank you, brothers
37, mild to moderate ED since age 21, 3 Dopplers - 1 result VL & 3 later results 'no physical problem', dependent on cialis (efficacy now waning), overcame Lymophoma at age 26, ED causing immense/profound psychological distress. Considering implant.

ED2013
Posts: 1231
Joined: Tue Mar 05, 2013 8:15 pm

Re: 90% there

Postby ED2013 » Thu Jun 21, 2018 9:34 am

If you want to give it another try before taking the plunge, why not try professional women? Find one you are coming comfortable with. They can be very supportive.

FreddyFree
Posts: 587
Joined: Mon Nov 06, 2017 12:43 pm

Re: 90% there

Postby FreddyFree » Thu Jun 21, 2018 10:10 am

defiant wrote:Mental or physical,


I don't think the cause is that important. When you can't you can't, so fix it. If I had known about implants 20 years ago, I would have got it then.
AMS 700 CX 18cm. x 12mm. With 3cm. RTEs. 10/10/18

defiant
Posts: 525
Joined: Mon Apr 25, 2016 9:35 am

Re: 90% there

Postby defiant » Thu Jun 21, 2018 10:29 am

ED2013 wrote:If you want to give it another try before taking the plunge, why not try professional women? Find one you are coming comfortable with. They can be very supportive.


I'm not sure I'd feel comfortable in that situation and feel as though I'd be more likely to fail. God this sucks.
37, mild to moderate ED since age 21, 3 Dopplers - 1 result VL & 3 later results 'no physical problem', dependent on cialis (efficacy now waning), overcame Lymophoma at age 26, ED causing immense/profound psychological distress. Considering implant.

defiant
Posts: 525
Joined: Mon Apr 25, 2016 9:35 am

Re: 90% there

Postby defiant » Thu Jun 21, 2018 10:30 am

FreddyFree wrote:
defiant wrote:Mental or physical,


I don't think the cause is that important. When you can't you can't, so fix it. If I had known about implants 20 years ago, I would have got it then.


I can't think of many decisions much more important than this one though and I need to do all the necessary due diligence. But as I am right now, I am completely useless down there at the mo.
37, mild to moderate ED since age 21, 3 Dopplers - 1 result VL & 3 later results 'no physical problem', dependent on cialis (efficacy now waning), overcame Lymophoma at age 26, ED causing immense/profound psychological distress. Considering implant.

mikestap
Posts: 173
Joined: Sat Sep 01, 2012 12:19 pm
Location: Atlanta, GA

Re: 90% there

Postby mikestap » Thu Jun 21, 2018 11:40 am

Defiant,
I agree with ED2013. You may not be comfortable the first time, but why not try several sessions with the same woman? Or ask a close friend.

It seems to me that the sheer repetition in attempts with the same individual would break down any mental anxieties.

Give it a try. If I had had any shot at natural erections like you appear to, I would. And it sounds like it would be fun.

Good luck.
64 Years. RALP 2013. Received 22cm Titan Dec 20, 2017 by Dr Hakky. See results at download/file.php?id=5320 and download/file.php?id=4754
Revision 3-25-21 24 cm XL No RTE

radioradio
Posts: 1012
Joined: Tue Aug 09, 2016 2:44 pm
Location: Philly Burbs

Re: 90% there

Postby radioradio » Thu Jun 21, 2018 12:47 pm

Defiant,

Please see my PM.

Bob
Born '52. Married '79. RALP 3/1/17. ED 50+% prior to surgery even w/ meds. VED, Injections, ineffective. Considering implant even before PCa diagnosis. Dr. Kramer 8/2/17. LGX 21cm+0.5 RTE. Kramer replaced/repositioned pump 12/13/17. Willing to Show/Tell.

Lost Sheep
Posts: 6144
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2016 11:16 pm

Re: 90% there

Postby Lost Sheep » Fri Jun 22, 2018 1:08 am

Dump the self-loathing. It is toxic ad self-perpetuating. Also a lie.

It is not your fault.

Repeat that as many times a necessary. You may have a fault, but having the defect IS NOT YOUR FAULT.

You may own the fault if you wish, but you are not to blame.

Remember also that sex is not centered in the body. The biggest, most powerful and sexy organ we have is the mind. And you can make up your own mind.

During my years of E.D. I learned that there is more to sex than coitus and my lovers (most of them, anyhow) appreciated that I paid attention to their pleasure as well as my own. While sex may not have had the full pantheon of activities that a hard penis allows, we had good sex nonetheless and my self-esteem may have been dented, but did still function.

You can do the same.

Say NO to self-hate, blaming and toxic thoughts.

You are a MAN. You can turn a woman on with (working in concert with her) your minds. A penis is just an aid, not the only tool in your toolbox.
Lost Sheep
AMS LGX 18+3 Nov 6, 2017
Prostate Cancer 2023
READ OLD THREADS-ask better questions -better understand answers
Be part of your medical team
Document pre-op size-photos and written records
Pre-op VED therapy helps. Post-op is another matter

Larry10625

Re: 90% there

Postby Larry10625 » Fri Jun 22, 2018 5:29 am

defiant wrote:Guys, I’m on the cusp of opting to get this done and attempt to put all of the stress, the worrying, the fear of failure, the self-loathing and deep upset behind me for a shot at a more sustained and confident future, one that will allow me to truly move forward in life without this issue creeping into every single facet of my life.

But of course, being someone who (according to doctors) suffers only from mental blocks as opposed to physical ones makes this a truly tough call. And yes, I’ve tried it all now, psychologists, two of them, a shrink, an anti anxiety medication with no sex sides, meditation, even a hypnotist, all at great cost to my wallet with no tangible benefit. At all.

I want to try at least one more time with another woman, the ‘natural’ way, with pills (which have always worked but my levels of anxiety and depression being what they are now I’m not sure they will again). But it’s all just so disheartening and disappointing and this has been going on over a decade now and the only thing that has remained constant is the gradual decline in mental state, anxiety and thus, ability.

I’m calling upon anyone who has two cents to share, to please lend an opinion, share with me your experiences with the implant, try to imagine yourself in my shoes, relatively young and single but with such devastating history with this problem. Mental or physical, it’s still a very very real problem and to me, it’s one body, body and mind. And mine is malfunctioning.

Thank you, brothers




LostSheep is absolutely right. ED is a viscous circle. Can't get (and/or keep) an erection so it effects your confidence and self esteem. Because you have low self esteem and confidence issues, you can't get/keep it up which affects your self esteem. And so on and so on and so on. The implant will allow you to have an erection when you want it, for as long as you want it. Because you are having mind blowing sex again, your confidence came back and your level of self esteem rises. No, you will not have a natural erection but, is how you get the erection really all that important in the grand scheme of things?? Not for me. :)

Larry

oldbeek
Posts: 2466
Joined: Sun Sep 10, 2017 1:46 pm
Location: Los Angeles area

Re: 90% there

Postby oldbeek » Fri Jun 22, 2018 2:40 pm

Larry10625 wrote:
defiant wrote:Guys, I’m on the cusp of opting to get this done and attempt to put all of the stress, the worrying, the fear of failure, the self-loathing and deep upset behind me for a shot at a more sustained and confident future, one that will allow me to truly move forward in life without this issue creeping into every single facet of my life.

But of course, being someone who (according to doctors) suffers only from mental blocks as opposed to physical ones makes this a truly tough call. And yes, I’ve tried it all now, psychologists, two of them, a shrink, an anti anxiety medication with no sex sides, meditation, even a hypnotist, all at great cost to my wallet with no tangible benefit. At all.

I want to try at least one more time with another woman, the ‘natural’ way, with pills (which have always worked but my levels of anxiety and depression being what they are now I’m not sure they will again). But it’s all just so disheartening and disappointing and this has been going on over a decade now and the only thing that has remained constant is the gradual decline in mental state, anxiety and thus, ability.

I’m calling upon anyone who has two cents to share, to please lend an opinion, share with me your experiences with the implant, try to imagine yourself in my shoes, relatively young and single but with such devastating history with this problem. Mental or physical, it’s still a very very real problem and to me, it’s one body, body and mind. And mine is malfunctioning.

Thank you, brothers


Larry, BUT a natural erection is so much better than an implant, this guy needs to try everything first. My last natural, Cialis assisted, erection was only 9 months ago just before the RP surgery. I REMEMBER NATURAL ERECTIONS. They are far superior to this stick in my dick.

LostSheep is absolutely right. ED is a viscous circle. Can't get (and/or keep) an erection so it effects your confidence and self esteem. Because you have low self esteem and confidence issues, you can't get/keep it up which affects your self esteem. And so on and so on and so on. The implant will allow you to have an erection when you want it, for as long as you want it. Because you are having mind blowing sex again, your confidence came back and your level of self esteem rises. No, you will not have a natural erection but, is how you get the erection really all that important in the grand scheme of things?? Not for me. :)

Larry
82, good health, RP 7-2017, all nerves taken , PSA 0.05, 4-18,, .07 1/19,.05 4/19, .03 11-21, .04 11-23, implanted 4-1-18, Infra-pubic, AMS lgx 15 cm with 5cm rte. Implant at USC Keck. Dr Boyd and Dr Loh Doyle 6.5 x 5, 800 AUS 7-21-20


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