Thanks, DTWarren, for a good explanation of getting an aneros in place.
You also asked a good question: "What's more important--sexual pleasure or not feeling like a deviant?" Someone else told me in chat the other night that he bought an aneros, but threw it out because it didn't work on the first few tries. And he was afraid his wife might find it.
If you don't want to order an aneros at an 'adult' site, order it like I did from
http://www.highisland.com/ which is the parent company. I can see where some guys would feel funny ordering a 'prostate stimulator' that looks like a phallic dildo. But the PS-2 I use doesn't look like that at all. If you're still afraid your wife may find it, then maybe you need to talk about it. If not, you can always store it with a slip of paper, "For helping ED" in case someone's snooping in your things. Better yet, try to talk with your wife. (Easier said than done, I know!)
In any case, it's not deviant to try and get one's nerve endings to work properly! In doing some research, I found out an interesting tidbit. When a man has had serious spinal injury, or a doctor is simply trying to determine if a guy's penile nerves are working, they put one finger on the anus. Then they give a quick squeeze to the glans (penis head). It's like a reflex test. If the nerves are intact, the anus will involuntarily contract when the glans is "pinched." So there's a direct connection between the anus and the tip of your penis. (Now how many guys are going to rush to the bathroom to try that little trick!?)
We don't think it's strange for a doctor to stick his finger up the anus in order to do a DRE (digital rectal exam). So why should it be weird to stick a piece of plastic in the same place to help erectile function?
The anus/rectum/perineum (taint)/penis -- they're all wired together. Nerves responsible for good erections go well beyond the shaft of the dick! It's not deviant to capitalize on that. Now my question is how to use aneros exercises to give overall improvement to erections, even when it's not inserted.