Older wives

There is more to sex than an erect penis. How do you maintain your sexuality both for yourself and for your partner? What techniques do you use to give both of you a great, satisfying sex life? How do you explore your own body and sexuality now that the rules have changed?

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ontopher469
Posts: 88
Joined: Mon Sep 12, 2011 12:05 am

Re: Older wives

Postby ontopher469 » Mon Dec 28, 2015 10:27 am

Here’s an update two years later. I’m 73 and my wife is 75. My wife still gets to vigorous orgasms very easily and quickly.

Our routine is still much the same as what I reported two years ago, i.e., touching of her clitoris. A new refinement is that before giving her oral on her clitoris, I now start out with one finger, followed by two, inside her vagina on her G-spot. This appears to strengthen her subsequent orgasms. She especially seems to like it when I repeatedly insert my ‘wet’ finger/fingers inside her mouth! My favorite vagina entry position is now missionary rather than her on top. I now like the missionary position because I like to spread her legs wide apart and pulling her knees up to her chest. This allows a much improved angle of entry into the vagina. Now, I can easily slide the erect penis into the vagina and slowly push it completely into and touch the bottom of her vagina. This position allows me to greatly lengthen my ‘pumping time’ to delay final ejaculation. My next goal is to get up the nerve to give her vagina oral after ejaculation to clean up my semen/KY lube from her vagina.

midwestman
Posts: 48
Joined: Thu Oct 08, 2015 8:41 pm

Re: Older wives

Postby midwestman » Sun Feb 14, 2016 1:27 am

ontopher469 wrote:Here’s an update two years later. I’m 73 and my wife is 75. My wife still gets to vigorous orgasms very easily and quickly.

Our routine is still much the same as what I reported two years ago, i.e., touching of her clitoris. A new refinement is that before giving her oral on her clitoris, I now start out with one finger, followed by two, inside her vagina on her G-spot. This appears to strengthen her subsequent orgasms. She especially seems to like it when I repeatedly insert my ‘wet’ finger/fingers inside her mouth! My favorite vagina entry position is now missionary rather than her on top. I now like the missionary position because I like to spread her legs wide apart and pulling her knees up to her chest. This allows a much improved angle of entry into the vagina. Now, I can easily slide the erect penis into the vagina and slowly push it completely into and touch the bottom of her vagina. This position allows me to greatly lengthen my ‘pumping time’ to delay final ejaculation. My next goal is to get up the nerve to give her vagina oral after ejaculation to clean up my semen/KY lube from her vagina.


ontopher469 - Back when I had semen - I loved to go down on my wife after I ejaculated - her smell mixed with mine was heavenly and I had no issues with the taste, smell or texture. Go for it!

To the point of the OP, I am 55, my wife is 56. As she has gotten older she has become more orgasmic - both in ease of orgasm and having multiples. A couple weeks ago I was giving her oral (direct clit stimulation) and she orgasmed over and over for at least a full two minutes :o It was awesome and I didn't stop until she begged me to! However, foreplay does "warm her up" for intercourse and the resulting orgasm(s). I now take longer to reach orgasm during intercourse due to numb areas on my penis since my implant, and she will usually orgasm over and over until I finally orgasm. Used to be, in her younger years, getting to orgasm was many times hard, sometimes impossible - so I'm happy it's worked out this way.

Cigar56
Posts: 478
Joined: Fri Aug 15, 2014 10:56 am

Re: Older wives

Postby Cigar56 » Mon Feb 29, 2016 5:42 pm

Hats off to you guys having these great experiences. Some of us have wives who simply have lost all interest as they age.
Age 61 as of 2017. Under "active surveillance" for small amounts of cancer in prostate as of 2016. Quit using ED pills and now using injections. Considering an implant. Surgeon advises shrinking prostate to avoid damaging bladder during RALP.

williamb
Posts: 175
Joined: Wed Sep 09, 2015 9:48 pm
Location: south Louisiana

Re: Older wives

Postby williamb » Mon Feb 29, 2016 8:01 pm

Like Cigar56 implied hats off to you, I can not begin to tell you how envious I am of you but also how happy I am for you. Keep on keeping on.
Good Luck
williamb
68 yr old, AMS CX 18 + 3 RTE, Oct 2015 by a Houston Doctor. Left with loss of length, Floppy Glans and pain, a very poor job. Revision in Dec 2016 by Dr Kramer, 21 + 3 1/2 RTE,Regained length, Glans supported and no pain.
Williamb

cincinnatus1951
Posts: 208
Joined: Wed Jun 17, 2015 11:54 am
Location: Houston TX, USA

Re: Older wives

Postby cincinnatus1951 » Wed Mar 02, 2016 12:43 pm

Interesting older women in sex
First, let me say I am blessed with a wonderful wife and we have a wonderful sex life, recently enhanced with an implant. I am 75 and my wife is 72. A little history to set the stage, we are both Catholic and were married in our mid 20s. Growing up, sex was something dirty, sinful, prone to disease and pregnancy. Women were supposed to hate it and do it as a duty. Accordingly, we got off to a slow start. Then came kids and sex was a stolen 15 minutes while the kids were watching Saturday morning cartoons. Later as the kids got older, we got to take some vacations on our own and discovered relaxed and even some “kinky” sex. That involved nude beaches, experimenting with anal, use of toys. We always involved oral in our lovemaking and have slept nude since we were married. We began to look forward to empty nesting. Once the kids were out of the house, we did not have to worry about if, whether or what we were wearing, or how much noise we made during lovemaking. We were never sexual triathletes, one long (hour to 2 hour) session and an occasional quickie were our regular frequency. We always communicated freely over what we liked, did not like and whether a session was a “rafter rocker” or just so.
Once I retired, we had time to explore and play. I am usually the initiator and until recently, researched and purchased our toys. I got a penile piercing (2ga in the frenum) to enhance things. We settled into a pattern of setting aside some time (three hours). We’d start off with a shower together or a soak in the Jacuzzi tub, shave each other’s bottoms, kiss and touch a while, lie naked on the bed and have a small glass of champagne. Later we added a vibrator for her while we were enjoying the wine. Then we would go for it. Usually with taking turns with oral, touching each other and then sex is a couple of positions. We usually finished with woman astride and my wife with a bullet vibrator right at the apex of her vulva. As a number have said clitoral stimulation is critical.
I began to develop ED as a result of blood pressure meds. The uro prescribed 10 mg of Cialis which solved the problem for me. At the same time, my wife started to lose interest. We discussed it and she talked with her gynecologist. The gyno said she uses testosterone pills, ground up and mixed with petroleum jelly and it improves her libido. My wife agreed to try that and it works wonderfully. She applies a small amount to her vulva about an hour before sex, and her desire improves. We have dubbed this “horney cream”
The next chapter starts with my diagnosis of prostate cancer in May 2013. I had an RPP in July. Post surgery, I tried pills, vacuum and muse with little effect. Prostate surgeon recommended trimix, which I used with varying results for two years. The problem with tri mix was I might get an erection that lasted 10 minutes or one that bumped the magical four hours. Plus, all the injecting, elevating blood flow immediately following, etc. made things about as spontaneous as an election.
During that time, if I wilted, my wife coined what she calls “Just for me time.” What we did was I pleasured her using toys and tongue. She really enjoyed this because she did not have to think about where I was in the process, she could just enjoy. We would later finish me manually. She has had five minute orgasms this way. Even now, she will occasionally ask for “just for me time”, which I am glad to oblige.
Explaining all this to the surgeon at my 2 year follow up, he recommended I see an ED specialist and consider an implant. I did and after 2 second opinions, we decided to go for the implant. We are glad we did.
The bottom line for interesting older women in sex is: first, communicate. Second, there has to be something in it for the lady, no one is going to be very interested in a “slam bam, Thank you m’aam”. Third, if your sex life has gone into limbo, you need to start it up again slowly. Don’t be afraid to go to a sex shop, either a physical one or online. Jointly decide on a toy or toys, experiment with it together. Allow enough time to relax and get into the mood.
This worked for us, but, as I said, we did not have a lot of baggage to overcome.
A word about the testosterone for women, it is not FDA approved, it has to come from a compounding pharmacy. Some Gynos will prescribe it, some will not. I’d suggest going to or contacting a compounding pharmacy and ask if they make it. If so, ask which doctors locally will prescribe it. We have not experienced any side effects. My wife has been using it probably weekly for several years,
Hope this helps.
Cincinnatus
Age 77, Wife 75 Married 50yrs RPP Dr Brian Miles, Houston Methodist, July 2013. Used VED, pills, MUSE, and trimix with no or mixed results. 18cm Titan, one RTE by Dr Mohit Khera, Baylor, Houston, Jan 2016

dg_moore
Posts: 1131
Joined: Mon Apr 25, 2011 9:34 am

Re: Older wives

Postby dg_moore » Wed Mar 02, 2016 5:26 pm

Cigar56 wrote:Hats off to you guys having these great experiences. Some of us have wives who simply have lost all interest as they age.

Yup. It's the human condition - sex always ends, and the process is never the same for everybody. What works for you will not necessarily work for the next guy. If both partners lose interest then all is well (unless sex is the only thing that keeps you together) - the stress comes when one is interested and the other isn't. Also, not uncommonly age is accompanied by illness or debility, either of which can render sex no longer important.
Dave, 74, Maryland - Implant (Titan) 2008 by Dr. Andrew Kramer - never used due to a stroke that, among other things, ended my sex life.
Life is not the way it's supposed to be, it's the way it is.

roninhouston
Posts: 231
Joined: Tue Mar 03, 2015 2:25 pm
Location: Houston

Re: Older wives

Postby roninhouston » Sun Jun 12, 2016 12:33 am

Posted this in the Implant Discussion Board, but thought it applies here too. The thread started when a man's wife had a low desire ......

Unfortunately getting an implant does not make a bad relationship better. Many of our partners and us, have given up on the intimate side of the relationship. Once intercourse was problematic because their partners have had ED for a long period of time. If one does not find ways to keep the fire in the relationship the desire for intimacy may diminish. We end up living as friends but not as lovers. Of course this is to assume you have eliminated all medical issues that may kill ones sex drive. Partners Counseling maybe an option too.

If you want to pursue rekindling the desire this is good book written for senior partners about health and sex. It recommends ways to revive desire in women and men, putting intimacy back into relationships. It is available in book form, but It is also available in audio on Audible. Audio would allow you and your wife to listen to it together. This book goes beyond "in and out" penetration and discusses many ways to have a sexual life together again. The last chapter sums it up.....Better Now than Than Ever: the Joys of Older-Age Sex

Naked at Our Age: Talking Out Loud about Senior Sex by Joan Price
Foreword by Betty Dodson
Chapter 1. The Old Ways Don’t Do It Anymore!
Chapter 2. Reviving Desire
Chapter 3. Sex Toys: Now More Than Ever
Chapter 4. Together yet Alone: Is This My Marriage?
Chapter 5. Talking about Sex
Chapter 6. Off the Beaten Path: Nontraditional Sex Practices and Relationships
Chapter 7. Surviving Divorce, Breakup, Betrayal
Chapter 8. Sex with Myself
Chapter 9. Unlearning Our Upbringing: Women’s Stories
Chapter 10. Unlearning Our Upbringing: Men’s Stories
Chapter 11. When Sex Hurts: Vulvar/Vaginal Pain
Chapter 12. Reclaiming Sexuality After Cancer
Chapter 13. Erectile Dysfunction: What Men Don't Say Out Loud
Chapter 14. Erectile Dysfunction: Women Speak Out
Chapter 15. No Way Back: When Your Partner Has Alzheimer’s Disease
Chapter 16. Death, Grieving . . . and Then What?
Chapter 17. Sensuality for Hire
Chapter 18. DWO: Dating While Old(er)
Chapter 19. Safer Sex—Yes, At Our Age
Chapter 20. Better Now than Than Ever: the Joys of Older-Age Sex

The book ends with "Meet Our Experts", information where you can seek help for all types of senior situations.

Joan's website is http://www.joanprice.com/nakedatourage.html She has several videos there talking about the book and joys of senior sex. Joan has a new book that expands on this one.

Hopefully you and your wife can rekindle the intimate side of your marriage.
Bionic with AMS CX on August 14, 2015. Inflated September 15th by Dr. Robert Cornell. http://www.eddoc.net
72 with VL
. Pre-Op VED Protocol Therapy and Post-Op VED Protocol Therapy: Pre-Op length by 6th month.

monroe7526
Posts: 7
Joined: Sat Jan 09, 2016 12:22 pm

Re: Older wives

Postby monroe7526 » Mon Aug 08, 2016 3:48 pm

I have a significant other who is 68. She has an orgsm overtime we have sex. She is always on top.

I just can't seem t have an orgasm.

trimixboy
Posts: 29
Joined: Wed Jan 04, 2012 11:33 am

Re: Older wives

Postby trimixboy » Sat Aug 20, 2016 4:31 pm

I'm 60 and my wife 58. Been on trimix for 5.5 years after RP.
Sex twice a week. With the trimix, it takes a little bit longer for me to orgasm, so we almost always go 30 minuntes
after penetration with about 30 min of backrub type foreplay before.
I have asked her what gets her horny and her reply is "Sex gets me horny". It is wierd. Most of the time she is almost indifferent to sex
until we decide to do it. Then she goes all out, gets so slippery and wet, during sex, it drives me crazy. She has always liked to get
on top which is great as far as I am concerned, and when she finally comes, I can feel her pussy pulsing against my dick about once
every 5 - 10 seconds. I it amazing. I would like to do it more often, but twice a week with 10/10 mind blowing sex is good for me.

JimBob07
Posts: 12
Joined: Wed Aug 10, 2016 9:34 am

Re: Older wives

Postby JimBob07 » Wed Aug 24, 2016 3:58 pm

Good for you! I am almost 60. You inspire me! My wife still likes it, and has at least 5 orgasms per session. Anything less, and it feels like we missed something!


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