coping

What are your fears? Ideas? Hints? to coping with ED. What helps you with your mental game? How are relationships affected?
6gun 44 mag
Posts: 112
Joined: Sat Dec 17, 2011 11:01 pm

coping

Postby 6gun 44 mag » Fri Jun 21, 2013 12:09 pm

I'm probably a lot like many of you men. I'm 68, have had ED for a good 10 years with a few good success times with pills or shots, but my wife is older, and she simply has gotten out of the routine of sex and play at this stage. Her needs are different than mine, and I find myself lonely as hell, and quite frankly miserable many times. The effort required is not worth the pay off in her mind. So we don't try very often, at least not as often as I am still willing to try. I never was big on porn or solo action stuff, so relief from all this is difficult for me. Trimix is working less and less, just a half solid tool, and it goes down so fast.I must have a venous leak as wide as a highway. Just wish our amazing medical world would create something safe, wonderfully effective, easy to use, spontaneous, and it would bypass all the aspects of ED in a big way. Be nice to plow with a hard tool and go deep again, hear her moan a bit. Just venting here guys, thanks for your support and caring, as you have mine.

limpnoodle
Posts: 26
Joined: Fri Apr 22, 2011 12:44 pm

Re: coping

Postby limpnoodle » Fri Jun 21, 2013 3:55 pm

Man I feel your pain. Sounds like you and I are in the same boat. I am about to be 65 and my wife is older also. It is to the point that sometimes I think she is happy I have got ED as she really doesn't care about sexual activity at all any more. The ED is frustrating enough alone but throw in a partner that is not willing to help and it becomes depressing. What makes it worst for me is with a tension band and daily cialis I can get a semi usable erection but she really is not interested in helping. When I try to talk to her about where we are she gets mad and says you're blaming me. Mention trying oral and reply is that is disgusting. Another odd fact is I felt like we had a very good and active sex life and enjoyed things she now finds disgusting until menopause hit her and maybe that's the whole problem.When I am able to convince her to try anything she usually says "it's not working" and we quit before I can climax. Frankly after my prostate surgery (PCa 5+ yrs ago) she was hardly any help at all in the "penile rehab" and I do have some ill feelings toward her for that. I have considered the two of us going to thearpy but I think she would refuse. Showed her an internet article about sex being enjoyable for seniors and her only comment was "why did you look that up". Like you I am just venting but would welcome any suggestions as to how to deal with the situiation.

6gun 44 mag
Posts: 112
Joined: Sat Dec 17, 2011 11:01 pm

Re: coping

Postby 6gun 44 mag » Fri Jun 21, 2013 6:29 pm

After reading your reply Limp------we are brothers in this state of affairs. I hope someone comes on here and tells us a good solution. If I had a dick that was reliable, things might be different, many can say that though. Hey, good luck, and keep in touch.

JDavid
Posts: 221
Joined: Sat Mar 16, 2013 5:58 pm

Re: coping

Postby JDavid » Fri Jun 21, 2013 9:56 pm

I suggest booking an appointment with a therapist and telling your wife you are going to talk about the relationship and she is welcome to participate. She will.
I am sixty-six years of age and dealing with gradually worsening ED for twenty years. At sixty-three I wanted something that worked reliably. I got an AMS 700 LGX implant in 6/25/13. I am entirely pleased with the outcome. My surgeon was Dr. Karpman.


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