Next Generation ED Drug

Well, they called me a month or so ago. This lady’s voice was on the other end of the line – “You have ED?” I’ll admit, it caught me off guard. I was wondering who told her and who else they were telling. Was it fodder for Letterman? Was it on bathroom stalls? Just who had my wife been talking to?
She had a strong accent of some kind and it was a bit hard to understand her. I asked her how she knew. I thought she said “Doctor stole your records.” I admit, I was flattered. I mean, who knew there was a black market value to the prostate saga of a middle aged guy? It made me akin to the celebrities – I mean, finally the paparazzi had found me. Sort of like the lottery, I always knew it had to happen sometime. Then, the horror sunk in. She was trying to blackmail me, I was sure of it.
“Uhhhhhh,” I said brilliantly. My obvious intellect clearly impressed her.
She said again, “You have ED?” What do you say when you answer the phone and someone just puts it to you like that?
“Maybe,” I said. “Who wants to know?” then added cryptically, “What’s it worth?” Gee, I was quick.
“We will study you. $20 a visit”
“$20 a visit? Who will visit me?”
“No! you come here. We will give you drugs and see if they work.”
Let’s just say the possible scenes that flashed before my eyes were both terrifying and exhilarating.
To make a long, embarrassing story short, I’ll show myself some mercy and cut this short. My prostate surgeon had shared his patient data base with a doctor at Mt. Sinai Hospital in New York City, who was participating in the final clinical trial of a new ED drug called Avanafil. It is supposed to be the next generation ED drug. It will work in 15 minutes. It has a very short half life, so it does not stay in your body very long, therefore, it has very few side effects. It apparently has no drug interactions. It can be taken on a full stomach. You can drink alcohol with it. The benefits of it will linger for about eight hours, and you can use it twice in 24 hours.
This sounded great – Sign me up! I got my preliminary visit out of the way – it was basically a free, very thorough physical. I got my envelope – eight doses – and hurried home. A few nights later I popped the pills and waited for Nirvana. And waited, and waited. Nothing. Lucky me! I got the placebo. There was not even the faintest of effects. I had to exist like this for a month! It’s been a long month.
Yesterday, I went back for my second of four visits and reported the results. The nurse did show some sympathy. She thanked me on behalf of all the men I was helping. I got another envelope of pills. I haven’t tried them yet. I’m not sure I’m ready for the disappointment. I’ll keep you posted. But when this stupid trial is over, just remember all the guys who have ‘gone without’ for the sake of these studies. It gives me a whole new respect for the human guinea pig. Think of the poor guys who had to try out the first penile implants – it makes you shudder. Thanks guys.